FMLs submitted from Staffordshire

Today, my ex-fiancée's new boyfriend phoned me to ask what her ring size is. FML

by Anon / 09/06/2015 at 8:50am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend's band has become quite popular on YouTube. My friends and sister won't stop singing their songs. Most of them were written after I dumped him, and go on to say how much better off he is without me and how horrible I am. FML

by guttedgirl / 06/04/2011 at 7:35am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, after watching over my drunken mother all last night to make sure she didn't choke on her own vomit, I came to the conclusion that at the age of 53, she's more of a party animal than I ever will be. I'm a 22 year old man. FML

by ForeverAlone / 04/15/2011 at 8:52pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, Amazon didn't deliver the present I bought my mother for Mothering Sunday, so she called me an 'Ungrateful bastard.' And about half an hour ago, I cut my thumb whilst making her lunch. She said, 'You're doing this on purpose so I feel sorry for you. Well I don't.' FML

by Trainspotting / 04/03/2011 at 9:32am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML

by missbrit / 02/04/2011 at 2:59am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was selling personalised stockings at work. When handing a customer's order over to her, which had no name on, I joked, "Oooh this is a bit mysterious". She replied, "Actually, it's in memory of the baby I miscarried earlier this year." FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2010 at 9:06am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Work

Today, I fell down the stairs while reading the 'mind your step' sign. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2010 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I showed my fiancé the darling Tinkerbell hoodie I'd bought myself during the weekend. Instead of liking it as I'd hoped, he told me my childish wardrobe was embarrassing, and he wasn't going to be seen in public with me until I wore something different. FML

by Crystal / 03/08/2010 at 4:35pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, I woke up in a closet of a four star hotel, having spent the night drinking. I am a secondary school teacher and I have been visiting this place on a school trip. My flight left at 4am this morning and it's now 1pm in the afternoon. FML

by Nicholasand / 11/23/2009 at 1:29pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Transportation