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FMLs submitted from South Carolina

Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML

#20026176
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28645) - you deserved it (6172)

On 08/17/2012 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my fiancé told me that he was having second thoughts on our engagement. Instead of just calling it off, he took me to a fancy restaurant and took a public poll on whether we should get married. The majority said no. FML

#20003754
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30976) - you deserved it (2293)

On 08/05/2012 at 9:20am - love - by exfiancee (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I called the cops to let them know that a drunk man was driving dangerously down my road. About an hour later, I was going to the store and got pulled over for speeding by the cop I called. FML

#19943890
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7561) - you deserved it (31226)

On 07/16/2012 at 2:04am - misc - by SCdriver (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I finally got enough money to buy the car I wanted for a year now. It was stolen today too. I had my car for 4 hours. FML

#19847645
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33880) - you deserved it (2304)

On 06/25/2012 at 10:55pm - money - by stolen-car - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML

#19792340
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23134) - you deserved it (3832)

On 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I didn't even bother to turn my cellphone off in a movie theater because I knew no one would text me or call. FML

#19661266
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26235) - you deserved it (4476)

On 05/22/2012 at 7:02am - misc - by Rick - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12785) - you deserved it (20905)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML

#19401263
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14265) - you deserved it (23702)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by potatoebee - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML

#19314232
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10045) - you deserved it (22867)

On 03/20/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by thatswhatsup66 - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

#19085877
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28518) - you deserved it (2375)

On 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I spent two hours filling out an online application and questionnaire for a potential employer. The application stated that there were no right or wrong answers and to answer truthfully. I was automatically rejected. FML

#18853580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24261) - you deserved it (4997)

On 01/19/2012 at 2:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML

#18760852
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44114) - you deserved it (2396)

On 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by liLbob6598 - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my business is doing so badly that people are teaching their kids to drive in the empty parking lot. FML

#18565836
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30162) - you deserved it (2539)

On 12/20/2011 at 10:18pm - work - by Thomas - United States (South Carolina)



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