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FMLs submitted from Shanghai

Today, my husband wanted me to take a sleeping pill before having sex with me. Apparently I'm better in bed while half-asleep. FML

#21238124
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41243) - you deserved it (5619)

On 08/15/2014 at 11:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - China (Shanghai)

Today, after finishing a two hour essay exam that will determine the future of my career, I realized I misread the question. FML

#21132154
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46144) - you deserved it (11497)

On 05/06/2014 at 5:11am - misc - by IBS (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I sang a romantic song I wrote for my girlfriend. She laughed at my soprano. FML

#20996292
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35375) - you deserved it (7545)

On 12/17/2013 at 8:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

#20982547
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40280) - you deserved it (2964)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by unlucky neighbors - China (Shanghai)

Today, I got two pieces of mail. One was a fine for not presenting my concession card to ticket inspectors on a train. The other was my concession card. FML

#20912116
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38348) - you deserved it (3041)

On 10/08/2013 at 3:09am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - China (Shanghai)

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML

#20627240
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50336) - you deserved it (11204)

On 04/28/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, I congratulated a bride standing in front of a church in a white dress. Turns out she'd been stood up at the altar. She thrashed me with her bouquet. FML

#19482907
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25491) - you deserved it (3550)

On 04/17/2012 at 6:52am - misc - by Wrongword - China (Shanghai)

Today, I was in a restaurant with my fiancée for dinner. I commented that she had some food around her mouth. She responded with a lecture, then by throwing her hot bowl of noodles at me, before stomping out the restaurant. FML

#17634135
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24418) - you deserved it (3867)

On 09/01/2011 at 6:14am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, I was told that I was an idiot by a little girl because I didn't deliver a pizza to her house fast enough. FML

#15205906
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24315) - you deserved it (8295)

On 03/05/2011 at 10:46am - work - by deliveryboy - China (Shanghai)

Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML

#2043570
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57147) - you deserved it (3250)

On 05/18/2009 at 4:48am - health - by esk (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, a couple of mates and me have a reservation on this fancy restaurant to celebrate Chinese New Year. I found out that 80% of our money goes to the wine tasting event that they have, a free flow of gorgeous, decent wine all around. I'm allergic to fruit. I'll stick to my 20RMB water bottle. FML

#2482
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15952) - you deserved it (2622)

On 01/24/2009 at 8:36pm - health - by anx133 - China (Shanghai)

Today, I daringly tried that fish-bath thing, where all these fish come and eat all of your skin's dead cells. I got into it, and after 15 minutes of being a human buffet, at least 20 of the fish died. FML

#1305
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31062) - you deserved it (5708)

On 01/15/2009 at 8:25pm - health - by anx133 - China (Shanghai)

Today, like any other day I struggled to put my boots on, went to pee and noticed my pants were covered in what looked like a green dust. I touched it, sniffed it, and it smelled utterly horrendous. So I took my boots off again only to find that one of my cats had took a dump in one of them. FML



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