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FMLs submitted from Saskatchewan

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, while on my way to an important interview, I was stopped and ticketed for speeding. The ticket made me 20 minutes late, but when I showed up, I was told they forgot to call and let me know that the woman I was supposed to meet with called in sick this morning. FML

Today, I'm so poor that I've been scrounging around my house all day trying to find quarters and dimes so that I can buy myself a cup of coffee tomorrow. FML

#20521315
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29935) - you deserved it (6548)

On 02/25/2013 at 3:39am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

#20481657
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42968) - you deserved it (8338)

On 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, after two weeks of being grounded, I was finally let out of the house by my mom. I had to call her at 1am asking her to come get me, because I got so drunk, I told my ride to leave without me. I'm grounded again after less than a day of freedom. FML

Today, after being totally in love with a guy since middle school, I finally had enough self confidence to go and talk to him. Turns out he's boring as fuck. I obsessed over this guy for nearly 4 years. FML

#20123261
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12127) - you deserved it (35443)

On 10/18/2012 at 10:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, after saving up for weeks, I bought myself an iPad. Because mine is better than the one my parents bought my ten-year-old brother, he got pissed and threw it into our pool. I'm now grounded for getting angry and calling him a bastard in the aftermath. FML

#20112275
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39104) - you deserved it (2582)

On 10/11/2012 at 4:37pm - misc - by future missing person maker person thingy (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

#20038307
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24943) - you deserved it (1632)

On 08/23/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I had to take Viagra. FML

#19671113
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36365) - you deserved it (7487)

On 05/24/2012 at 1:42am - intimacy - by aaah. (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, in a training class, I got to see a picture of what can happen when a man does not wear a safety harness correctly. For those of you who are unaware, male body parts are easily severed by loose straps. I cannot un-see that picture. It wasn't even a harness safety class. FML

#19635115
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20955) - you deserved it (1948)

On 05/16/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by recmonty - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

#19631611
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25795) - you deserved it (9822)

On 05/16/2012 at 10:19am - love - by Coykoi - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I panicked when I saw a spider on my shoulder from the corner of my eye. It was a birthmark. The same one that has been there for the last 23 years. FML

#19286969
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9958) - you deserved it (21899)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:54am - misc - by lct722 - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my girlfriend called me a lazy pig. To prove her wrong, I decided to go lift some weights. A few reps in, my arm cracked and my first reaction was to squeal like a pig. FML

#19187002
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9573) - you deserved it (27554)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Ismellbacon - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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