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FMLs submitted from Quebec

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24777) - you deserved it (4986)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, that's she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML

#8270152
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16840) - you deserved it (4624)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:54pm - love - by britney - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was hit on by an older man. I rolled my eyes at him and informed him I was 16, hoping that would get him to leave me alone. He shrugged and said, "We're both human." FML

#8103902
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23543) - you deserved it (2763)

On 02/10/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by creepster (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went to the drugstore to get supplies for my broken toe. Because of the swelling, I could only wear open-toed sandals on this cold day. At the store, a tall, heavy man in winter boots tried to get by me, and ended up stepping on the toes of my good foot. FML

#7094930
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18724) - you deserved it (1818)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:26am - health - by ouchie (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my very traditional grandmother has decided it's time for me to get married to Kevin. She's called half the town and informed them of the good news. I'm 17. I've never met Kevin. FML

#6580570
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36464) - you deserved it (1691)

On 12/03/2009 at 4:47am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I called my mother who is vacationing in Florida with my dad and sister. Before they left I told them I would be very responsible and that they could trust me. The first thing she asked me is if all the animals were still alive. I said yes. I lied. Her favourite cat drowned in the pool. FML

#6325781
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8252) - you deserved it (33877)

On 11/16/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by baddaughter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

#6316031
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53207) - you deserved it (3152)

On 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my roommate's boyfriend moved in. I'm in love with him. Now I get to live with the happy couple. FML

#6273710
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28135) - you deserved it (8256)

On 11/12/2009 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML

#6178217
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27749) - you deserved it (5001)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by failedexam (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her mom who had passed away years ago "told her that I was cheating on her," telepathically. FML

#6075479
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30489) - you deserved it (2240)

On 10/30/2009 at 9:32pm - misc - by iGotSkill (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, the guy I was seeing put candles all over his room to make things romantic. As we were getting it on, a plastic bag caught fire next to the bed. He had the brilliant idea to wave it around to put it out. Burning pieces of plastic landed on my arm. FML

#6045813
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13299) - you deserved it (2387)

On 10/28/2009 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by LadySteph12 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I drove 3 hours to go to an award ceremony. When I got there, I had to wait an hour for the hall to open, then sat listening to speeches for two hours, got my "award", and drove 3 hours home. The award was a small pin that I already had. FML

#5988986
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21027) - you deserved it (3243)

On 10/25/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by HoShiz (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML

#5942198
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29739) - you deserved it (2849)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by kthx (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



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