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FMLs submitted from Pennsylvania

Today, I sent out my resume to about a dozen jobs on Craigslist. I realized that I hadn't updated it in a while and went to double check it after the fact. My ex at some point had changed my objective to "I'm a cocksucker who needs a job real bad." FML

#2412
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25097) - you deserved it (6998)

On 01/24/2009 at 5:50am - money - by waitingformyfoodstamps - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML

#2341
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12871) - you deserved it (12540)

On 01/23/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I invited this guy I fooled around with over to "hang out". He's "en route", so I start to make my bed only to find my cat thought this was the best time to tell me she's sick by throwing up in my bed. I only have one set of linen. FML

#2316
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14021) - you deserved it (5381)

On 01/23/2009 at 10:12am - love - by LC - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I moved back home because I got laid off and could no longer afford my apartment. I decided to take a nap and when I woke up I overheard my Mom telling my Aunt that she used to be so proud of me and wonders when I became such a loser. Burn. FML

#2215
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19565) - you deserved it (2188)

On 01/22/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by TotallyFkd - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend came to visit me for my birthday. Over dinner he handed me a blank card that had the words "I love you" hastily written on it. When the waiter came to take our order he informed him that we'd be paying separately. Happy Birthday. FML

#1942
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21769) - you deserved it (1952)

On 01/20/2009 at 5:47pm - love - by nicegirl08 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went downstairs to grab a snack and a glass of Silk (you know, the soymilk). When I get back to my room, I go to throw the snack on my bed to shut the door, but I tossed with the wrong hand. FML

#1926
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9705) - you deserved it (17637)

On 01/20/2009 at 4:06pm - misc - by crystalwho - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML

#1705
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28668) - you deserved it (1822)

On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent 6 hours on an airplane next to an alcoholic Pink Floyd fanatic. I must've drifted off because when I took a trip to the bathroom I noticed that my pant leg that had been closest to the drunk man was soaking wet. I returned to my seat. He was on his side, facing me. I smelt the wet spot. Not beer. FML

#1452
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16784) - you deserved it (1371)

On 01/17/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by millzee - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

#1028
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5292) - you deserved it (42587)

On 01/13/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Gale - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I enjoy reading this site and other people's suffering just to feel better about my own life. FML

#818
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22441) - you deserved it (6361)

On 01/08/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by sampaloompy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up late, didn't shave, didn't have time to iron my clothes, didn't eat breakfast, and ran into the office with beads of sweat running down my face. The meeting had been cancelled. FML

#813
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13406) - you deserved it (1692)

On 01/08/2009 at 2:42am - work - by Poopalipa - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was jacking off casually to a picture of my ex-girlfriend, when all of the sudden, my friend sends me an IM picture of a granny bending over which pops up on my screen. I think my sex life is ruined forever. FML

#539
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14447) - you deserved it (24444)

On 12/17/2008 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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