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FMLs submitted from Pennsylvania

Today, for my birthday my boyfriend bought me a sexy outfit to wear for him. At the bottom of the bag was a razor. FML

#107726
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32344) - you deserved it (16597)

On 02/22/2009 at 8:32pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

#107589
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68560) - you deserved it (2901)

On 02/22/2009 at 8:21pm - love - by scotto (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at my softball game, there was one spot left for center field. The coach had to choose between me or the girl who forgot her glasses and was blind without them. He chose her. FML

#104917
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40860) - you deserved it (4186)

On 02/22/2009 at 3:41pm - misc - by JRock - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up happy because I'd met the man of my dreams at a bar. We had shared an amazing night together. I walked around my apartment, wondering where he'd went. Turns out, he was gone. So was my car. FML

#87157
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50224) - you deserved it (25236)

On 02/20/2009 at 10:38am - intimacy - by clueless2 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked through my college dorm and a freshman was watching some overly dramatic show on her laptop. I smiled and asked if it was a new episode of 'Gossip Girl.' She was on a video chat with her boyfriend. They were about to break up. FML

#74742
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11508) - you deserved it (42472)

On 02/19/2009 at 12:22am - love - by baddormgirl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML

#71381
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41386) - you deserved it (7679)

On 02/18/2009 at 7:43pm - misc - by Fack. (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML

#63875
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36128) - you deserved it (3155)

On 02/17/2009 at 9:52pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent $20 on a spray tan, $30 to have my make up done, and $50 on a pretty new dress all for a special date with my boyfriend. It turns out I spent $100 just to get dumped. FML

#60483
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41700) - you deserved it (7300)

On 02/17/2009 at 12:05pm - misc - by bertthelamb (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed was a care package. It was a scale to encourage me to lose weight. FML

#55512
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31324) - you deserved it (5368)

On 02/16/2009 at 7:26pm - health - by Loot (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my ex-boyfriend came over. After I finished pouring my heart out to him about how much I missed him, and how much I loved him, he looks at me and asks "So are we gonna do it, or what?" FML

#52695
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39334) - you deserved it (9987)

On 02/16/2009 at 12:08pm - misc - by k (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at work. I work at a grocery store and a woman pulls a cart to me filled with chips, breads, lunch meats, and sodas. I said to her "Looks like you are going to have a fun party" she then looks at me and says "My mother just died, this is for after the funeral. FML

#52207
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37455) - you deserved it (9447)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:37am - misc - by KMKWEEN (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML

#43502
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67502) - you deserved it (6987)

On 02/14/2009 at 7:38pm - misc - by NeverCampingAgain (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother was driving me and my friends to a wedding. My friends and I were talking about birth control, and then my mother chimes in, "Yeah, I used to use the sponge, but the spermicide would always burn your dad's penis." FML

#42695
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36643) - you deserved it (6319)

On 02/14/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Grossed out (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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