Today, I was supposed to see an apartment. 30 minutes after I was to meet the owner, she still hadn't shown. I called her. When I got no response, I was annoyed and kept calling. Finally, she answered, said, "I'm in the hospital with my father. He just died. Please stop calling me," and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40772) - you deserved it (16799)
On 03/05/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by ohboy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was meeting my sister's fiancé. I went to an internet cafe before I went to her house for dinner with them. I was on a computer and there was this really attractive man next to me. I was flirting with him and we exchanged numbers. Turns out, he is my sister's fiancé. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58199) - you deserved it (5504)
On 03/05/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by f*** (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56356) - you deserved it (1599)
On 03/05/2009 at 11:06am - animals - by nochance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was debating weed legalization in drug awareness. I was thoroughly unleashing arguments: how marijuana turns normal citizens into criminals, how the government spends billions to enforce drug laws, when I lost my train of thought. My teacher grinned saying, "My point exactly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10971) - you deserved it (37477)
On 03/04/2009 at 11:21pm - health - by katzperiod (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my friends decided it would be funny to give me a "hickey" with a vacuum cleaner while I was passed out drunk. Not only do I have to try and explain this to my girlfriend, but we're meeting her parents for lunch this afternoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47127) - you deserved it (17700)
On 03/04/2009 at 11:24am - intimacy - by hoovered (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my cat was in the bathroom when I was undressing to get into the shower. I realized that he was the only male to have seen me naked in the past two months. Then he started scratching the door for me to let him out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44099) - you deserved it (7127)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:36pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got a phone call from my mother asking me if I was okay. Confused, I asked her what she meant. She then told me that my boyfriend had broken up with me, and she just wanted to make sure I was handling it alright. I had to find out my relationship was over from my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62142) - you deserved it (2456)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:02pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I drank for every year I've been in school. While in my bed I decided I was too drunk to get up and throw up in the bathroom so I decided to just do it on my floor and clean it up later. Later on I woke up and realized I threw up on my $1000 laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20641) - you deserved it (164774)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:28pm - health - by ugh!! (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I put my hand into a vending machine to retrieve a bottle of water that was caught in the slot. After a minute, I realized I was trapped. 2 hours, 4 fire trucks, 3 police cars, and 1 ambulance later I was freed. The vending machine was in pieces and the bottle of water wasn't even for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37594) - you deserved it (9651)
On 02/26/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by VenderBender (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend said that being with me was his payment for past sins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43025) - you deserved it (3382)
On 02/25/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by sadgf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend owns and wears more thongs than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45763) - you deserved it (4904)
On 02/24/2009 at 11:33pm - misc - by asdfghjkl_12 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (63576) - you deserved it (16849)
On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was DJ'ing a wedding. The groom wanted a song played for his grandma and grandpa. I announce over the microphone for his grandparents to come to the dance floor for a special song. Turns out his grandparents have been dead for over a year and the song was supposed to be in dedication. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41487) - you deserved it (7681)
On 02/23/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by holladaddy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
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