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FMLs submitted from Pennsylvania

Today, my grandma's cat peed on my full leg cast. The closest doctor was a three hour drive away. So my grandma wouldn't take me at all the whole weekend. FML

Today, my mother stormed into my room shouting about how I never go anywhere and then tells me to go out "NOW" and do something. As she is pushing me out the door, her boyfriend walks in. FML

#8843088
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26602) - you deserved it (2334)

On 03/05/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by FatalxDesire599 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a wasp flew into my room. While I, a 6'2" hockey player, cowered in the corner, my 4'11" girlfriend killed it. FML

#8770884
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9000) - you deserved it (36443)

On 03/02/2010 at 10:53am - animals - by Jeff - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to catch a shuttle bus. I awoke to the sound of a car horn. I ran out in my boxers and saw a bus take off down the road. I chased it, thinking I had missed my bus. I realized I hadn't only when I saw frightened kids in the back of the bus. FML

#8751170
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7170) - you deserved it (19474)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - work - by militiousroflcopter (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I gave a technical presentation to a group of male colleagues. I was surprised by how attentive they were until I went to the washroom and realized that they could see every detail of my nipples through my new shirt. FML

#8673018
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19937) - you deserved it (13901)

On 02/26/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by bun593 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was finally hooking up with a girl I was after for a long time.Things got really hot and heavy but she stopped and looked at me weird. She said, "I can't do it, you're really wet. It looks like chicken fat." FML

#8658617
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17342) - you deserved it (3333)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:21am - intimacy - by humiliated - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out all the money my dad has been saving in the bank for me since birth has all been spent, by my mother who I haven't seen or talked to in about two years. FML

#8654790
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (1565)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:04am - money - by Julia - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend came to visit me. He told me he was cheating on me, and that he wanted to break up. I was so angry that as he left, I started screaming at him out of my second story apartment window. I picked up a huge potted plant and shoved it through the window at him. It missed my ex and hit my car. FML

#8646489
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12060) - you deserved it (40804)

On 02/25/2010 at 7:33pm - love - by MUemma (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was trying to take the cap off a can of spray cooking oil. It was really stuck so I pulled extra hard. It flew off and I punched myself in the head. I also sprayed myself in the eye with it. The lump on my forehead and my swollen shut eye make me look like Popeye, but I'm a girl. FML

#8636971
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18929) - you deserved it (4698)

On 02/25/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by popeye (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, before my date came to pick me up, I put tissues under my arms so I wouldn't leave wet marks. I forgot to remove them, and when we got physical, they fell out, looking like I'd stuffed my bra. FML

#8606978
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10503) - you deserved it (28946)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:54am - intimacy - by kiki (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML

#8557043
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28064) - you deserved it (2572)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:13pm - misc - by condiments - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom came over to visit and permed my hair. Ten minutes after she started, I told her it was burning. She told me to suck it up because it doesn't hurt that badly. I now have scabs all over my scalp, hairline, and nape. FML

#8443272
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21740) - you deserved it (3195)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:24pm - love - by sexxibxmami - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned the reason they say don't keep your phone in high humidity places. I left my phone on the counter when I went to take a shower. It now won't turn on due to water damage and the warranty doesn't cover it. FML

#8341883
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5280) - you deserved it (30742)

On 02/16/2010 at 3:46pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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