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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from Pennsylvania

Today, I found out less than 3 weeks before my wedding my fiancé will lose his new, great paying job unless we cancel our nonrefundable honeymoon. FML

#13263221
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32149) - you deserved it (3122)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:14pm - love - by no luck - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

#13188457
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24688) - you deserved it (2371)

On 09/24/2010 at 10:35pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was riding in the backseat while my mom was driving. Noticing she was driving way over the speed limit, I opened a police siren app on my iPod to make her slow down. When she realized, she pulled over, kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. FML

#13118537
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14344) - you deserved it (39185)

On 09/19/2010 at 8:07pm - misc - by whitefox123 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my car wouldn't start, so I had to wait for AAA. Then, hurrying to pick up my brother, I got a $161 speeding ticket. Twenty minutes later, I got a call from him saying he didn't need a ride anymore. FML

#13116896
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23260) - you deserved it (5631)

On 09/19/2010 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my nose was really stuffy. I heard somewhere that inhaling tea steam clears up the nose. While reading a magazine I inhaled my cup of green tea steam, without knowing that slowly I was moving my cup closer to my nose. Hot tea was sucked into my left nostril and burned the inside badly. FML

#12985084
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8795) - you deserved it (30717)

On 09/10/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received an email from an ex who I haven't heard from in two years. Excited that it might be her asking if we could meet up, I opened it. It was a virus. FML

#12978381
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29201) - you deserved it (8341)

On 09/09/2010 at 3:58pm - love - by kevdev (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML

#12913788
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27206) - you deserved it (3182)

On 09/05/2010 at 4:14am - love - by ohmydog (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned that if you don't wrap your hair around a bristled curling iron the correct way, you end up getting it stuck, not to mention frying it. Three inches of my hair is now in the trash. FML

Today, it's my nephew's second birthday. He was sitting on my lap, so I started tickling him. He laughed and squirmed so much, he smashed his mouth on my desk. Two bloody hours at the hospital later, he has no two front teeth. FML

#12838070
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24534) - you deserved it (8923)

On 08/31/2010 at 12:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at a tennis match and it was really hot. I took off my shirt to cool down. A member of the staff then tapped me on the shoulder and told me that my "bare breasts might offend someone." I'm a man. FML

#12832622
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23667) - you deserved it (13932)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:15am - misc - by bennyp77 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was closing at work when someone came in ten minutes before close (2am) and placed a huge order. I couldn't turn him away because he's my manager from my other job. He was drunk. FML

#12807710
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26917) - you deserved it (2990)

On 08/29/2010 at 4:37pm - work - by xharuki - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me how the message I left on her phone was one of the funniest drunk dials she's ever gotten. I'm debating whether or not I should tell her that I don't drink. FML

#12793954
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26905) - you deserved it (3603)

On 08/28/2010 at 9:36pm - love - by 713 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, seconds after my mom put my yorkie onto my bed, he threw up. His head was not fully over the bed itself, so the wet chunks fell straight into my backpack onto my new school books. FML

#12625429
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24920) - you deserved it (3086)

On 08/19/2010 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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