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FMLs submitted from Pennsylvania

Today, my apartment burned to the ground. I was packed and ready to move out tomorrow. FML

#16622108
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53300) - you deserved it (2938)

On 06/12/2011 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML

#16614936
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28910) - you deserved it (6704)

On 06/11/2011 at 6:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, on my way home from work, I decided to bring my pregnant wife a bouquet of roses to surprise her. Her response? "Why didn't you get me something useful, like chicken wings, instead?" FML

#16583514
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40170) - you deserved it (9642)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was bored. Some people would've called up friends to hang out. Not me. I had the sudden urge to make an entire Excel Spreadsheet on how much I've spent on iTunes, month-by-month. I'm not sure what's worse, that I got really into it, or that I've spent nearly $800.00 on iTunes. FML

#16554560
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14351) - you deserved it (27903)

On 06/07/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Mik (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13481) - you deserved it (31829)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. He said he would have done it two weeks ago but he needed someone to drive him around while his car was getting repaired. FML

#16209782
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41772) - you deserved it (4027)

On 05/16/2011 at 6:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML

#16160002
532 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35139) - you deserved it (18719)

On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized I have more dogs than I do friends. I have two dogs. FML

#16126414
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35380) - you deserved it (6146)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my teacher told me I wasn't pretty enough to play the princess part in the play. FML

#15769893
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40026) - you deserved it (5200)

On 04/13/2011 at 12:36pm - misc - by sophie - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML

#15749672
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53319) - you deserved it (13542)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:27am - love - by BrokeAndPsst (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

#15713068
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15758) - you deserved it (22863)

On 04/09/2011 at 7:00pm - animals - by Danielle - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML

#15698653
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18117) - you deserved it (33586)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I returned home to find the key to my mailbox missing. I called the post office and was informed that a new key will cost me $15. I have no money, and my paycheck is in the mailbox. FML

#15636997
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31826) - you deserved it (4674)

On 04/04/2011 at 3:47pm - money - by DaisyMay (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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