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FMLs submitted from Oregon

Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML

#5741744
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32885) - you deserved it (4349)

On 10/09/2009 at 3:52pm - health - by Unlucky (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the Fire Department found my car overturned in a ditch and on fire. It was two miles away from where I parked it about three hours ago. FML

#5635477
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35697) - you deserved it (1942)

On 10/04/2009 at 1:48am - money - by ThatTrafficCone (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML

#5598991
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34324) - you deserved it (10397)

On 10/02/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by asshole (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was on my computer when the girl that I really like instant-messages me. I went to type back, accidentally pressed control-V, and posted an entire article on how to remove genital warts. FML

#5579268
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13363) - you deserved it (40997)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:58am - health - by Garrett (man) - United States (Oregon) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, after months of enduring my neighbors relentlessly yapping schnauzer, Molly, I moved into a new building. I was greeted by my new neighbor and her yapping rat terrier, Molly. FML

#5413899
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37496) - you deserved it (3552)

On 09/22/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by bellaellaella (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was having an after work-out dinner with my ex-girlfriend and we were having a great time, catching up, eating good food, all the good things. Then when I got home, I realized I just talked to my ex-girlfriend for an hour and a half about how much better her new boyfriend is than me. FML

#5285675
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10338) - you deserved it (35277)

On 09/16/2009 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my brother thought he would take my key and steal my shoes from my football locker while I was at practice. What he didn't think about was him leaving my locker unlocked for the 3 hours of practice. Someone stole my iPod, my cell phone, my wallet, and all of my clothes. FML

#5201463
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41072) - you deserved it (2342)

On 09/12/2009 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I called the company with whom I had a job interview last week, which I thought went great, but hadn't heard back from. One of the interviewers claimed that I tried to grope her. FML

#5201164
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30458) - you deserved it (2608)

On 09/12/2009 at 2:32am - work - by badjob - United States (Oregon)

Today, I parked in front of a grocery store and took the portable GPS system off the mount on the dashboard and put it in my pocket so no one would break into my car and steal it. When I got back, the window was smashed and someone had stolen the plastic mount. FML

#5194159
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36568) - you deserved it (3011)

On 09/11/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by sucksforme (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

#4896361
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41543) - you deserved it (9201)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:27am - love - by notenough (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

#4859599
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64652) - you deserved it (2349)

On 08/27/2009 at 1:23pm - money - by crookedteeth (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

#4845223
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62274) - you deserved it (3125)

On 08/26/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by AreYouSerious (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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