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FMLs submitted from Oregon

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

#6131025
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37751) - you deserved it (2604)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:24am - love - by whysheheartless (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

#6036159
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33316) - you deserved it (7116)

On 10/28/2009 at 4:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got my tax return. I was really excited. Turns out the government does take the time to send out a tax return for $1.36. FML

#6025394
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27383) - you deserved it (3549)

On 10/27/2009 at 4:10pm - money - by nicolo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was sitting in the cafeteria when one of my friends yelled out "Jake is uncircumcised!" as a joke. The girl I have a crush on was sitting at the table behind me and turned around and asked if it was true. I said yes, she responded with "wow, hope I never have to see that." FML

#5921737
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19057) - you deserved it (3721)

On 10/20/2009 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by badnewsbears (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was flying home from LAX when I realized I left my ID back at the hotel. After making phone calls to the hotel and rental car company, I found it and made it back to the airport in time for my flight. After going through security, I realized I left my cell phone on the hotel counter. FML

#5903706
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12105) - you deserved it (31743)

On 10/19/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by LAXsucks (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got asked to Homecoming by the person I really like. I said yes and I was really excited. But my best friend who has liked me since the 6th grade wasn't. He went and broke my date's jaw. FML

#5865685
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37833) - you deserved it (6921)

On 10/17/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by AdriBAMF - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mother had 'the talk' with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML

#5784290
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19261) - you deserved it (1789)

On 10/11/2009 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was fired from a job I didn't have. The manager in charge of calling me to tell me if I got the job never called, and never called me back when I left messages. The only time he called me was to fire me for not coming to orientation, which, by the way, he never called to tell me about. FML

#5753501
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36917) - you deserved it (2066)

On 10/10/2009 at 3:23am - work - by superjesse006 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML

#5741744
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32966) - you deserved it (4358)

On 10/09/2009 at 3:52pm - health - by Unlucky (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the Fire Department found my car overturned in a ditch and on fire. It was two miles away from where I parked it about three hours ago. FML

#5635477
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35760) - you deserved it (1945)

On 10/04/2009 at 1:48am - money - by ThatTrafficCone (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML

#5598991
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34396) - you deserved it (10413)

On 10/02/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by asshole (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was on my computer when the girl that I really like instant-messages me. I went to type back, accidentally pressed control-V, and posted an entire article on how to remove genital warts. FML

#5579268
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13395) - you deserved it (41047)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:58am - health - by Garrett (man) - United States (Oregon) - moderated by Kevin Nealon



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