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FMLs submitted from Oregon

Today, I chipped a tooth trying to solve a Rubik's Cube. FML

#18343530
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9633) - you deserved it (25524)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:27am - health - by yollew - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband threw up in the shower after drinking almost a whole bottle of wine. The shower won't drain now. Happy Thanksgiving. FML

Today, I learned that my roommate, the one in charge of the cooking, never washes her hands beforehand. According to her, it boosts her immune system. FML

#18297525
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25475) - you deserved it (3631)

On 11/20/2011 at 12:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had an anxiety attack because I thought I'd lost my anxiety medication. It ended up being on the shelf right where I left it. FML

#18260815
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19200) - you deserved it (9238)

On 11/16/2011 at 12:11am - health - by anxiety (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

#18159887
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13077) - you deserved it (32513)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35521) - you deserved it (4989)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)

Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML

#17987492
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42518) - you deserved it (3503)

On 10/15/2011 at 3:18am - misc - by Ca13b - United States (Oregon)

Today, I finally told my crush that I like her. She said she could never date me, because apparently, "My best friend likes you." Her best friend is my step-sister. FML

#17758843
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30780) - you deserved it (2174)

On 09/16/2011 at 5:10pm - love - by messed up - United States (Oregon)

Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML

#17729862
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22856) - you deserved it (9687)

On 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm - misc - by justhereforlaughs (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to Give Head". It also said "Have a nice day!" FML

#17688076
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25176) - you deserved it (6905)

On 09/07/2011 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by thismakesmesad (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while playing a gig with my band, I tried pulling the classic "playing the guitar with one foot on the monitor" rock-star pose. However, I misjudged the height of the monitor, didn't notice the puddle of beer in front of it, slipped, and fell off the stage into the security guy. FML

#17679142
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9758) - you deserved it (24318)

On 09/06/2011 at 8:07am - misc - by NotKeithRichards - United States (Oregon)

Today, my whole family piled into our station wagon just to watch my mom take part in an arm wrestling contest. FML

#17634077
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20240) - you deserved it (3334)

On 09/01/2011 at 5:55am - misc - by Chris75 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my stepbrother found my diary and read it. He then told my boyfriend how I had a crush on another guy, and no longer liked him, causing my boyfriend to break up with me. That diary was from the third grade. FML

#17535182
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38683) - you deserved it (3225)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:25am - love - by Tinkerer - United States (Oregon)



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