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FMLs submitted from Oregon

Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML

#21444850
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24834) - you deserved it (2851)

On 07/21/2015 at 2:15am - love - by UnfortunatelySingle (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got in trouble for missing my shift. According to my idiot boss, "Crashes don't just happen." FML

#21442988
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25813) - you deserved it (1682)

On 07/17/2015 at 10:59am - work - by yeah - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML

#21440033
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24587) - you deserved it (2484)

On 07/11/2015 at 1:20pm - misc - by whymomwhy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future". even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

#21438331
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25923) - you deserved it (1462)

On 07/08/2015 at 2:17am - misc - by WayToGoDaddyHo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my idiot boss placed an expensive order for anti-bullying banners that read: "Take a stand against bullying!" This would be fine if I didn't work in a specialized school for children in wheelchairs. FML

#21436683
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22094) - you deserved it (1519)

On 07/05/2015 at 5:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, one of my friends asked me to flirt with her boyfriend to see if he would flirt back. Knowing this was a trust test, I agreed. She got pissed at me when he flirted back and still isn't speaking to me. FML

#21436223
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25573) - you deserved it (4399)

On 07/04/2015 at 4:55am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to eat dinner with his parents. Everyone wanted me to start the family prayer, and although I hadn't done one in years, I accepted. It went well until I remembered you say "Amen" at the end, not "Uh... Bye." FML

#21430513
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24481) - you deserved it (5249)

On 06/23/2015 at 2:37am - misc - by Arcanin3Boss (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I caught my mother-in-law trying to plant a GPS tracker on my car. FML

#21428876
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26679) - you deserved it (1781)

On 06/20/2015 at 1:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML

#21427425
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26154) - you deserved it (2059)

On 06/17/2015 at 3:42am - love - by canessadawn - United States (Oregon)

Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML

#21417834
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27621) - you deserved it (1806)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my roommate was making a waterproof iPhone case and decided to use my phone to test it out. It didn't work. FML

#21402720
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29754) - you deserved it (3431)

On 05/01/2015 at 1:30am - misc - by Crombinator - United States (Oregon)

Today, I filled out an online application for a internship. I didn't have all the info I need to complete it, but it wouldn't let me leave anything blank so to move along I filled in crap answers. I pressed "Save". It sent my draft in. I now have to explain that "Jesus" isn't actually my reference. FML

#21392735
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16349) - you deserved it (21604)

On 04/13/2015 at 1:20am - work - by unprofessional - United States (Oregon)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31160) - you deserved it (4475)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)



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