Today, my mom turned to me and said, "You know, you're the kind of person that has to change literally everything about themselves to get a guy to like you." I thought she was joking so I laughed. She then said "Like that. Your laugh... What is that? Change that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58848) - you deserved it (3783)
On 07/08/2009 at 5:43pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I thought my boyfriend of 6 years was going to propose to me. We're highschool sweethearts and he was my first. Just when he was looking into my eyes he says, " I've been seeing someone else for 2 years and I'm choosing her over you... it was a tough decision". FML
I agree, your life sucks (56522) - you deserved it (2677)
On 07/06/2009 at 7:27pm - love - by imaloser (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in grade 10. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39111) - you deserved it (7159)
On 07/04/2009 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by JSeth (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I looked in my pocket for the phone number of a girl I met last night at a party. I remembered us talking and exchanging phone numbers. When I found the piece of paper, I discovered that instead of writing her number down, I had drunkenly written down my own. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6908) - you deserved it (30474)
On 07/04/2009 at 1:54am - love - by mrdave (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56891) - you deserved it (9494)
On 07/04/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Cococautly (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, one of our store's beach balls came out of nowhere and whacked me in the back of my head. I started reaming out two young girls for playing in the store, even when they said it wasn't them. Soon after, one of my employees admitted that it was her. I made some 7 year olds cry and it wasn't them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6801) - you deserved it (36871)
On 07/03/2009 at 11:04pm - work - by Missa (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41384) - you deserved it (2536)
On 07/03/2009 at 3:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67190) - you deserved it (9717)
On 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10057) - you deserved it (46383)
Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans fit. Neither do my fat jeans. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20904) - you deserved it (37891)
On 06/29/2009 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I learned that when blender jars aren't locked, they fly off the blender, into the air, hit you in the head and explode all over your kitchen. Today, I also learned that after I'm attacked by a flying blender, the first thing my boyfriend asks is if I'm still gonna make him a smoothie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38290) - you deserved it (8378)
On 06/26/2009 at 8:29pm - misc - by lifesmells - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was driving 3 of my guy friends to a party that was half an hour away. There was an awkward silence for most of the trip. I just figured out why now. I've had sex with all 3 of my guy friends. They talk about it when I'm not around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9031) - you deserved it (76142)
On 06/25/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was visiting my friends new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughters. I'm a 37 year old male. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25018) - you deserved it (5003)
On 06/24/2009 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
