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FMLs submitted from Ontario

Today, still suffering from an eye infection, I received a customer complaint. Having red eyes, asking how a patron's day went, and thanking them as they left my register obviously means that I must be stoned out of my mind. Apparently I've moved to a city where you must be on drugs if you're nice. FML

#18037491
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19227) - you deserved it (1506)

On 10/21/2011 at 8:10am - work - by Customer Stonage Representative - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant with my boyfriend and his family. After the meal, we all decided to open our fortune cookies and read them out loud. On mine, it said "You will change your mind many times before settling down." I didn't realize what it meant until after I'd read it to them. FML

#18009557
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18182) - you deserved it (3158)

On 10/17/2011 at 8:16pm - love - by pupitre (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took the train to visit my parents, which arrives late at night. As I was getting off, the cute guy in front of me looked out the window, then turned to me and said, "Doesn't that guy out there give you the creeps?" That guy was my dad. FML

#17996578
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22788) - you deserved it (1572)

On 10/16/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by DaddysGirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML

#17986367
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26447) - you deserved it (4926)

On 10/15/2011 at 12:12am - misc - by CPD - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, a customer asked for my number. When I declined, he made a huge scene, shouting and scaring other customers. He tipped me seven cents. FML

#17980865
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16865) - you deserved it (1513)

On 10/14/2011 at 5:35am - work - by scribbler8 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom yelled at me because I refused to lend her money. The reason I won't lend her money? The last time I did, she and my dad went out and bought a Macbook and a new car instead of paying bills. Apparently I'm being 'selfish' by keeping my own money and putting it towards university. FML

#17951348
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30852) - you deserved it (1907)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML

#17945907
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7087) - you deserved it (25131)

On 10/09/2011 at 7:28pm - love - by Slayer - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML

#17922863
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8394) - you deserved it (26203)

On 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm - misc - by knzknz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML

#17878442
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13954) - you deserved it (6050)

On 10/01/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by soapy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was training a new guy at work, my husband spent half the day creeping outside in his truck. FML

#17868574
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17840) - you deserved it (2625)

On 09/30/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Cristie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I timed my walk to work perfectly so that I avoided getting sprayed by the rotating sprinklers along the street. As soon as I successfully passed the last sprinkler, a bus sped by me, hit a puddle, and covered me head to toe in muddy water. FML

#17855624
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25661) - you deserved it (2250)

On 09/28/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Daralea (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML

#17815777
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19832) - you deserved it (3858)

On 09/23/2011 at 8:32pm - misc - by yeah_im_mad_bro - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date to an expensive restaurant. After the meal, he got down on his knee and proposed. We've only been dating for two weeks, so I said no. He just silently kept staring me in the eyes, no matter what I said or did. I ended up having to walk home. FML

#17809445
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27497) - you deserved it (4822)

On 09/22/2011 at 11:05pm - love - by Storm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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