Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25989) - you deserved it (5433)
On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30808) - you deserved it (1579)
On 02/02/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by Sam (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26177) - you deserved it (2449)
On 02/01/2012 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by manhandled - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother in law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (2515)
On 01/30/2012 at 12:24am - kids - by myself - Canada (Ontario)
Today, as I was crossing the slush covered street to catch the bus, I slipped and fell right in the middle of the road. A woman in a car rolled down her window. She didn't ask if I was okay but just laughed and took a picture of me covered in cold, wet slush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18969) - you deserved it (1403)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by hopeless cluts (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40440) - you deserved it (6020)
On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29420) - you deserved it (4433)
On 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by wish.was.single (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28713) - you deserved it (2013)
On 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm - work - by emma209 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7745) - you deserved it (17138)
On 01/21/2012 at 5:44pm - love - by actor my ass (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, there was a big snow storm and I wanted to help shovel, so I put on 3 pairs of socks, 2 pairs of pants, 2 winter coats, 2 pairs of gloves, a hat and a scarf. Once outside, I was told to go back inside because the job was done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7779) - you deserved it (19274)
On 01/19/2012 at 9:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I started my new job as a dishwasher, and was very excited since I've been broke for weeks. A few people dined and dashed, apparently for the first time in the restaurant's history. My boss is superstitious. She fired me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22817) - you deserved it (1360)
On 01/17/2012 at 11:08am - work - by broke - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23550) - you deserved it (2015)
On 01/07/2012 at 7:33pm - health - by tictacnose - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I tried to discipline my two year old son. Whenever I do this, he starts pointing and imitating me, and I can't help but laugh. This explains why he never listens to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6455) - you deserved it (22225)
On 01/07/2012 at 12:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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