FMLs submitted from Oklahoma

Today, I found out my mom has been telling my entire family I need surgery on my "Labia" instead of my "Labrum". I went from needing shoulder surgery to needing vagina surgery with one group text. Thanks, mom. FML

by me / 07/10/2016 at 11:00pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health

Today, my train departed over 10 minutes early. It was the last train of the day. I missed my transatlantic flight and along with it the vacation and concert I'd spent over a year saving for. FML

by 3,500 down / 05/07/2016 at 4:00am / United States (Oklahoma) / Money

Today, the guy I've been seeing asked me to have a threesome. With his girlfriend. FML

by emi / 04/03/2016 at 1:18pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, my ex-boyfriend decided to humiliate me by confessing to my dad in detail what he and I had done together and "apologizing" for taking my virginity. FML

by awkwardmandy / 03/11/2016 at 1:28pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I was feeling terrible and posted on Facebook about how I was stressed out and feeling really lonely. My sister replied saying "#fatfuckproblems". 13 people liked it and some so-called friends posted stuff like "rekt" and "SLAYED, bitch!", all in less than a minute. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2016 at 2:12pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got fired from my job. When I asked why, all that was said to me was, "We don't have to disclose that information, but you did nothing wrong. It's just not working out." FML

by Kan23 / 01/25/2016 at 10:37pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Work

Today, I spent over $20 at the laundromat doing two weeks of laundry, just to avoid using the facilities in my apartment complex and having to deal with my creepy landlord trying to steal my underwear again. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2015 at 10:22am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML

by weldingmachine217 / 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I popped two tires hitting a curb. I called my dad hysterical, and he told me to call my mom and hung up. My mom's been dead for seven years. FML

by deadbeatdad / 11/15/2015 at 5:35pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Kids

Today, I was studying on a bench outside my dorm when the leg snapped. I decided to do the right thing and let administration know what happened. After assuring me it wasn't my fault, and having me fill out an incident report, they billed me $400. I can't enroll for next semester until I pay. FML

by smoothies14 / 11/06/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Money

Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML

by downgirl / 11/04/2015 at 1:02am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I had a nightmare and woke up terrified, scaring my roommate. What was the dream? That I'd had a panic attack because my box of Honey Nut Cheerios was torn and the bag inside was improperly folded. FML

by smoothies14 / 09/11/2015 at 9:15pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML

by ballthlete / 09/06/2015 at 12:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous