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FMLs submitted from Oklahoma

Today, I was feeling terrible and posted on Facebook about how I was stressed out and feeling really lonely. My sister replied saying "#fatfuckproblems". 13 people liked it and some so-called friends posted stuff like "rekt" and "SLAYED, bitch!", all in less than a minute. FML

#21520812
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18061) - you deserved it (4047)

On 01/29/2016 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got fired from my job. When I asked why, all that was said to me was, "We don't have to disclose that information, but you did nothing wrong. It's just not working out." FML

#21519490
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18992) - you deserved it (1278)

On 01/25/2016 at 10:37pm - work - by Kan23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I spent over $20 at the laundromat doing two weeks of laundry, just to avoid using the facilities in my apartment complex and having to deal with my creepy landlord trying to steal my underwear again. FML

#21508051
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20471) - you deserved it (1403)

On 12/26/2015 at 10:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML

#21493255
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25137) - you deserved it (3208)

On 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm - intimacy - by weldingmachine217 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I popped two tires hitting a curb. I called my dad hysterical, and he told me to call my mom and hung up. My mom's been dead for seven years. FML

#21492884
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25713) - you deserved it (1822)

On 11/15/2015 at 5:35pm - kids - by deadbeatdad - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was studying on a bench outside my dorm when the leg snapped. I decided to do the right thing and let administration know what happened. After assuring me it wasn't my fault, and having me fill out an incident report, they billed me $400. I can't enroll for next semester until I pay. FML

#21489212
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26628) - you deserved it (2263)

On 11/06/2015 at 12:29pm - money - by smoothies14 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML

#21488242
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21685) - you deserved it (2213)

On 11/04/2015 at 1:02am - animals - by downgirl - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had a nightmare and woke up terrified, scaring my roommate. What was the dream? That I'd had a panic attack because my box of Honey Nut Cheerios was torn and the bag inside was improperly folded. FML

Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML

#21465088
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20188) - you deserved it (12302)

On 09/06/2015 at 12:55am - misc - by ballthlete (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was forced to watch my 5 year old cousin. In an attempt to get him to sit still for a minute, I challenged him to a thumb wrestling match. It's been 2 hours and he keeps thumb wrestling me. If I stop, he cries. FML

Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML

#21443580
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23055) - you deserved it (2983)

On 07/18/2015 at 3:08pm - kids - by ddhaley1 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I woke up with a electric dog collar on my neck. I wouldn't have noticed it until my stepfather turned the collar to the highest intensity just to wake me up. FML

#21436783
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (1953)

On 07/05/2015 at 12:26pm - misc - by izaya - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out where my sister's pet lizard escaped to. I also found out that the little shit likes to hide in dark, cold places. I discovered this when I heard the bastard squeal as I started the lawnmower. FML

#21435132
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24872) - you deserved it (2260)

On 07/01/2015 at 11:10pm - animals - by Alex Andreas - United States (Oklahoma)



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