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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, I was coming home from a date, I saw my ex standing in my drive-way. He had dumped me 2 months ago saying he couldn't talk me. To make him jealous, I made out with my new guy before greeting him. Turns out he couldn't talk to me because he had had cancer and had been afraid to tell me. FML

#3469762
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16589) - you deserved it (70948)

On 07/04/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by Foster_Em - United States (Ohio)

Today, I exchanged numbers with this guy in the McDonald's drive-thru. When he asked why I gave him my number I told him I thought he had a nice smile. When I asked him the same question, he responded with "I just thought you had a nice rack". FML

#3453387
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12309) - you deserved it (43218)

On 07/03/2009 at 12:23pm - love - by dreamer2639 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to go get a new ID because my wallet was stolen, which had my social security card in it as well. I found out that to get your ID you have to have your social security card, and to get your social security card, you need your ID. FML

#3313265
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52175) - you deserved it (8001)

On 06/28/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by angry (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was awoken by my son squirting liquid on me from a bottle. We have a high deer population in our area, so I spray urine contained in black bottle on my plants to help deter the deer from eating them. I also water my flowers with water from a blue bottle. My son used the black one. FML

#3200106
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32277) - you deserved it (7371)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:17am - misc - by GoldenShower (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the movies. After it was over I got up and noticed a designer purse sitting on the ground in the back row. I opened it to look for anything that could give me a address so I could return it. The owner came back, assumed I was robbing her, and punched me in the nose. FML

#3196366
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38788) - you deserved it (5649)

On 06/25/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML

#3171611
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42984) - you deserved it (5057)

On 06/24/2009 at 11:33am - love - by MoxyR12 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, McDonalds charged me 21 cents for a honey mustard packet. The jerk manager made me break a $50 bill. So I grabbed all their napkins, carried them into the parking lot and tossed them all into the air in protest and drove off. Down the road, I realized I left my wallet at the counter. FML

#3117856
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13121) - you deserved it (75341)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:18pm - misc - by Jesse (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me telling me I have problems communicating and that I didn't understand her. When I asked her why she didn't talk to me about this before she said "I didn't want to talk about it." FML

#2987293
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49927) - you deserved it (3111)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was being pulled into a pool by my girlfriend. To avoid ruining my phone, I tossed it into one of the chairs behind me. I missed and it landed into the hot tub behind it. FML

#2912721
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43477) - you deserved it (9666)

On 06/15/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by WetPhone (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was accidentally tagged in a photo of a group of people by a 'friend' on Facebook. She later corrected it, apparently everyone had already seen the tag and decided that the comment box below was a great opportunity to discuss how none of them would ever be caught dead hanging out with me. FML

#2885817
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45711) - you deserved it (3421)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by Coolkid. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I busted my ass to help this old lady move her stuff because she was going to a nursing home. I was told I would get paid. When I finished four hours later the lady took me to a room and told me to pick out anything in her little goody bag. I got a race car as payment. FML

#2766394
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48296) - you deserved it (8700)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:03am - work - by person (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I received the final piece of puzzle that my boyfriend of two years has been sending me through the mail for the last week. Turns out, it wasn't a love letter like I originally thought it was. He was breaking up with me via a puzzle through the mail. FML

Today, I work for a company that sells a leading brand of condoms. They give away free condoms to employees at the office. I haven't gotten laid since I began working here. FML

#2745458
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40946) - you deserved it (6389)

On 06/09/2009 at 3:39pm - work - by IronMonkey (man) - United States (Ohio)



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