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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I chose to date him. After going on for five minutes about how unique and funny he is, I ask him the same question. His reply? "You were the first person to ask me out." He then rolled over and fell asleep. FML

#6648301
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24557) - you deserved it (3426)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by Fluory (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was informed after submitting my request to have Christmas off about 2 weeks prior to Thanksgiving that I was denied. About 15 minutes later, I overheard the person that denied my request talking with another agent, who put their request in today, that they were granted the holiday off. FML

#6594646
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25253) - you deserved it (1716)

On 12/04/2009 at 1:12am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I posted a note on Facebook about a weird dream I had about my ex-boyfriend, where I made out with him, then it transitioned into a vampires vs. werewolves battle. My ex private messages me and says there's a better chance of a vampires vs. werewolves battle than us ever making out again. FML

#6584536
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9071) - you deserved it (41813)

On 12/03/2009 at 2:34pm - love - by ohiochibi (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in class. I am an older student going back for my PhD. I was kicked out of class for "sassing" my instructor for telling him he was wrong about what took place at an event I was actually present at. My instructor is a 22 year old TA. FML

#6552021
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41030) - you deserved it (3797)

On 12/01/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by sassman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

#6413436
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15004) - you deserved it (5751)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by NotsexyEnough - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a squirrel beside a tree. Thinking it was cute, I stepped closer, picked up a pine cone and tried to lure it to come closer. After about two minutes of silently squatting on someone's lawn holding a pine cone, I realized the squirrel was dead. FML

#6391764
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24212) - you deserved it (13902)

On 11/21/2009 at 6:02pm - animals - by eyesightfail (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was enjoying the benefits of marriage with my new husband. We were changing positions when my joints started crackling and popping like my mother's did when I was a kid. My husband stopped, concerned about my possible pain... I'm 20 years old and pop like an arthritic 50 year old. FML

#6381623
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26006) - you deserved it (3344)

On 11/20/2009 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took the bus to work. I was exhausted and had a big mug of coffee. Half asleep and thinking I was in my car, I reached forward to put it in the "cup holder" during the ride. When I let go, I poured hot coffee not only all over myself, but also on the large, angry-looking man next to me. FML

#6340029
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8052) - you deserved it (24480)

On 11/17/2009 at 10:32am - misc - by Spiller (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that my coworker shared a laugh with the boss about setting the office desk on fire (which he actually did), while ten minutes later I was threatened with being fired because I made paper snowflakes and hung a few of them next to the computer. FML

#6308799
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23847) - you deserved it (2169)

On 11/15/2009 at 12:12am - work - by hanmart (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw an adorable girl at the bar and I went to talk to her. I decided to use my cheesiest pick up line to make her laugh. After I said it, she knew who I was. It was my cousin I hadn't seen in 8 years. FML

#6238334
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26958) - you deserved it (14163)

On 11/10/2009 at 12:47am - misc - by Dummy - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years told me he had feelings for someone else. He also told me he wanted to continue dating me until things progressed further with the other woman. FML

#6217928
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38082) - you deserved it (2187)

On 11/08/2009 at 8:27pm - love - by toughlove (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I was driving to work, I got a flat tire. While attempting to replace said tire, I got mugged. The guy took all my money, my iPod, cellphone, and CDs. When I finally called my boss to explain my situation, he fired me. Why? Because I was late and had an "overactive imagination." FML

#6205002
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33132) - you deserved it (2077)

On 11/07/2009 at 11:46pm - misc - by LifeSucks (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I let my nephew and his friend spend the night to watch movies. After I fell asleep they stole my liquor and went roaming. When they saw the cop car in front of my house and realized they were busted, they went up to the cop and told them I gave them the alcohol to avoid being grounded. FML

#6201657
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28556) - you deserved it (3237)

On 11/07/2009 at 8:35pm - misc - by AuntSucka (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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