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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

#12674562
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31660) - you deserved it (5474)

On 08/22/2010 at 12:26am - intimacy - by ananomus - United States (Ohio)

Today, my new $100 electronic cigarette came in the mail. I was so excited to try it out, I used it on the drive to work. The people who sold it to me weren't kidding when they said it looked and felt real. I threw it out the window when I was done. FML

#12604182
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11397) - you deserved it (60623)

On 08/18/2010 at 12:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I baby sit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

#12498801
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38348) - you deserved it (9201)

On 08/13/2010 at 12:14pm - kids - by qtpieo1 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

#12485840
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31299) - you deserved it (36126)

On 08/12/2010 at 9:01pm - intimacy - by Blueberrypicc (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend of one year told me not to walk beside him because people might "think we're together". FML

#12365363
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39815) - you deserved it (5452)

On 08/07/2010 at 2:06am - love - by WastedTime (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

#12209813
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43401) - you deserved it (3346)

On 07/30/2010 at 4:00pm - work - by MLZ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35087) - you deserved it (13617)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML

#12187023
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34331) - you deserved it (3569)

On 07/29/2010 at 1:29pm - misc - by pandaboo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that I get to spend the next two weeks at my grandparents house, which smells like cat litter, while the rest of my family takes a cruise through the Carribean. They can't afford to take a ninth person. FML

#12096842
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39118) - you deserved it (2720)

On 07/25/2010 at 1:45am - animals - by greaaaatt. - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend's father sent me a text message that simply stated "You ruined my relationship with my daughter." I wanted to ask him for his blessing to marry his daughter. FML

#12038820
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34818) - you deserved it (3076)

On 07/22/2010 at 2:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking for a parking spot and finally found one. Trying to figure out if the spot was legal, I asked a cop that had pulled up. He said it was fine. I came back 3 hours later to a parking ticket. FML

#11945278
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40272) - you deserved it (3789)

On 07/17/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while driving, a girl on her cellphone cut me off. A second later, another person behind me on a cellphone rear ended me. Her excuse was, "I'm sorry, you weren't there a minute ago!" FML

#11698354
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37145) - you deserved it (2758)

On 07/06/2010 at 12:42pm - misc - by drivencrazy (man) - United States (Ohio)



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