Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

#12209813
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40265) - you deserved it (3100)

On 07/30/2010 at 4:00pm - work - by MLZ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34741) - you deserved it (13556)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML

#12187023
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31241) - you deserved it (3324)

On 07/29/2010 at 1:29pm - misc - by pandaboo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that I get to spend the next two weeks at my grandparents house, which smells like cat litter, while the rest of my family takes a cruise through the Carribean. They can't afford to take a ninth person. FML

#12096842
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35984) - you deserved it (2476)

On 07/25/2010 at 1:45am - animals - by greaaaatt. - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend's father sent me a text message that simply stated "You ruined my relationship with my daughter." I wanted to ask him for his blessing to marry his daughter. FML

#12038820
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33026) - you deserved it (2930)

On 07/22/2010 at 2:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking for a parking spot and finally found one. Trying to figure out if the spot was legal, I asked a cop that had pulled up. He said it was fine. I came back 3 hours later to a parking ticket. FML

#11945278
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37441) - you deserved it (3502)

On 07/17/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while driving, a girl on her cellphone cut me off. A second later, another person behind me on a cellphone rear ended me. Her excuse was, "I'm sorry, you weren't there a minute ago!" FML

#11698354
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34196) - you deserved it (2540)

On 07/06/2010 at 12:42pm - misc - by drivencrazy (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at work as a musician, sitting on a piano bench. Suddenly I found myself at eye-level with the piano, dumped on the floor by the broken bench, with my legs splayed out. I felt like I picked the wrong day to wear a skirt to work - but the audience members all disagreed. FML

#11326623
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27546) - you deserved it (3887)

On 06/20/2010 at 3:21am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband purposefully said something to upset me. When I asked why he would do that, he told me it was to test my Prozac. FML

#11189132
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26577) - you deserved it (3788)

On 06/14/2010 at 9:50am - health - by greenblue90 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend lied about crashing his car just to avoid seeing me. FML

Today, it was my co-worker's birthday but she told me not to mention it. Feeling bad for her, I went out to buy her a card, a present, and even a small cake. It turns out that there was actually a party during our lunch break, and I was the only one in our office not invited. FML

#10983443
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34940) - you deserved it (3090)

On 06/05/2010 at 6:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: