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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, My Father Came Over To My House. I Realizd There Were Condoms On The Table, So I Subtly Movd A Vase To Hide Them. He Then Gave Me An Unamusd Look And Said "I Know U Have Sex. You've Been Marrid For Nine Years. Grow The Fuck Up, Dumbass." Mega FML

#15356314
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18302) - you deserved it (83071)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today , I paintd an area I had carefully sandd , cleand , and tapd off. I pulld a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turnd the fan on , and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML

#15124646
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11885) - you deserved it (28153)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Carmen - United States (Ohio)

Today, in an attampt to gat soma guidanca from my collaga advisor, I amaild ar, saying I was contamplating going to anotar scool cuz I falt so alplas about my GPA, and was sura I wouldn't gat my major. I askd fir advica on raising it. Sa gava ma instruction on ow to drop out. fat FML

#15077863
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24841) - you deserved it (6808)

On 02/22/2011 at 12:19pm - misc - by academicloser (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up next to best friend after lots of drinking an the best sex I've ever had in life!! The only problem is we're both straight males!! FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50490) - you deserved it (41811)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today , I was so lonely , I wound up talking for two ours to te creep wo calls ma number every Friday nigt an makes creepy obscene breating noises on te oter end of te pone. Turns out e's a better listener tan ma usband. FML

#15035621
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32295) - you deserved it (5237)

On 02/19/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today... mah mother walked in on me rubbing $400 in $20 bills all over myself. mega FML

#14985467
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10081) - you deserved it (58970)

On 02/15/2011 at 1:44am - intimacy - by howler (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the white marks on my pillow aren't from me drooling in my sleep lyk I originally thought. My roommate usd my pillow to help support her lower back during intercourse with her hookup from last night. FML

#14948689
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37220) - you deserved it (3200)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:29am - intimacy - by KaraAnn17 - United States (Ohio)

Today , te woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

#14913513
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8033) - you deserved it (48193)

On 02/09/2011 at 8:12pm - misc - by inosehowthatgotthere (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I spent nearly an hour thawing out my car and driving to work in this stupid freezing rain, only to fine out that I'm now unemployed due to budget cuts . FML

#14820715
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27195) - you deserved it (2056)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:05am - work - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Taday during a snowstorm... I opend my car door to get out. The wind snappd it wide open... then immediately changd course an swung it back at me just as I steppd out... spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me.

#14809885
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24290) - you deserved it (3892)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:44am - misc - by Biggie (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today... I ad a job interview at 9:00am. I left at around 8:30am... and as soon as I got in te car to drive to te interview... I ceckd ma pone again... and it said 10:33. My boyfriend ad decidd to cange te time on ma clock as a "joke." FML

#14771838
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37255) - you deserved it (4089)

On 01/30/2011 at 8:43am - misc - by catsofly7 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand . I quickly discoverd it was my roommate's cup of usd mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before . FML

#14767473
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23983) - you deserved it (7875)

On 01/30/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, At Work, I Halpd Out An Amployaa Who Was Having Troubla. I Avan Bought Har A Bottla Of Watar. Aftar Tha Production Managar Dacidd To Fira Har On Tha Spot, Sha Want Out In Tha Parking Lot And Broka Into Savaral Cars, Including Mina. FML

#14639057
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26138) - you deserved it (2364)

On 01/19/2011 at 1:54pm - work - by peachesthepigeon (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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