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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, I found out that the white marks on my pillow aren't from me drooling in my sleep like I originally thought. My roommate used my pillow to help support her lower back during intercourse with her hookup from last night. FML

#14948689
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33152) - you deserved it (2858)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:29am - intimacy - by KaraAnn17 - United States (Ohio)

Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

#14913513
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6845) - you deserved it (44250)

On 02/09/2011 at 8:12pm - misc - by inosehowthatgotthere (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I spent nearly an hour thawing out my car and driving to work in this stupid freezing rain, only to find out that I'm now unemployed due to budget cuts. FML

#14820715
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23955) - you deserved it (1825)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:05am - work - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML

#14809885
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22958) - you deserved it (3776)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:44am - misc - by Biggie (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had a job interview at 9:00am. I left at around 8:30am, and as soon as I got in the car to drive to the interview, I checked my phone again, and it said 10:33. My boyfriend had decided to change the time on my clock as a "joke." FML

#14771838
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33612) - you deserved it (3750)

On 01/30/2011 at 8:43am - misc - by catsofly7 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

#14767473
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20367) - you deserved it (7283)

On 01/30/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at work, I helped out an employee who was having trouble. I even bought her a bottle of water. After the production manager decided to fire her on the spot, she went out in the parking lot and broke into several cars, including mine. FML

#14639057
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23488) - you deserved it (2144)

On 01/19/2011 at 1:54pm - work - by peachesthepigeon (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28920) - you deserved it (3134)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

#14583340
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14403) - you deserved it (71858)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

#14579173
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22989) - you deserved it (4588)

On 01/14/2011 at 3:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, some construction workers kept going in and out the door next to my cubicle. They decided it would be easier to just prop the door open for the next hour. It's 20 degrees outside, and I'm wearing a dress. FML

#14543942
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18825) - you deserved it (5902)

On 01/11/2011 at 9:45am - work - by bitty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend tried to serenade me with The Sex is Good by Saving Abel. According to him, "I have to fake it, I'd leave if I could. I'm not in love, but the sex is good." FML

#14521815
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22069) - you deserved it (3372)

On 01/09/2011 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's been a full week since my last orthodontist appointment and I still can't eat anything besides Slimfast and pudding. FML

#14520919
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19196) - you deserved it (2652)

On 01/09/2011 at 1:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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