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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44397) - you deserved it (4691)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43538) - you deserved it (3568)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34224) - you deserved it (7157)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML

#17146449
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25426) - you deserved it (19570)

On 07/17/2011 at 4:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

#17145151
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32818) - you deserved it (7275)

On 07/17/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by grenade (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML

#17140359
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32635) - you deserved it (2405)

On 07/16/2011 at 8:19pm - health - by imobesejk (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML

#17107042
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29869) - you deserved it (2374)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:53am - intimacy - by TheGoodTwin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML

#17037512
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39097) - you deserved it (3106)

On 07/09/2011 at 3:04am - misc - by JohnyP - United States (Ohio)

Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really hot guy walking over. Trying to be sexy, I bit my hotdog cutely and winked. I ended up choking and dropping the ketchup covered hotdog all over my lap. FML

#16882947
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11510) - you deserved it (57198)

On 06/27/2011 at 3:15pm - misc - by ashhatches - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML

#16661874
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54875) - you deserved it (4698)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:37pm - love - by hatelife - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was home alone in my apartment. I tripped over my dresser and fell and sprained my ankle. As I was laying there in agonizing pain, my downstairs neighbor shouted at me to shut up. FML

#16638777
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27447) - you deserved it (4293)

On 06/13/2011 at 1:39am - health - by ow (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met my soon-to-be step mother. My dad was right, we had a lot in common. Including our birth year. FML

#16589535
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51257) - you deserved it (3646)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by stepsister - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

#16510311
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36494) - you deserved it (3302)

On 06/05/2011 at 3:00am - misc - by kyle - United States (Ohio)



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