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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, I was home alone in my apartment. I tripped over my dresser and fell and sprained my ankle. As I was laying there in agonizing pain, my downstairs neighbor shouted at me to shut up. FML

#16638777
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24202) - you deserved it (3964)

On 06/13/2011 at 1:39am - health - by ow (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met my soon-to-be step mother. My dad was right, we had a lot in common. Including our birth year. FML

#16589535
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49468) - you deserved it (3522)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by stepsister - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

#16510311
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35006) - you deserved it (3186)

On 06/05/2011 at 3:00am - misc - by kyle - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was on my first blind date. We went to a fancy restaurant in the middle in the city. After using the bathroom, I came back to an empty table. He stole my purse and left. FML

#16384205
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35215) - you deserved it (14332)

On 05/28/2011 at 8:44am - love - by dancer_2014 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

#16375821
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34602) - you deserved it (5415)

On 05/27/2011 at 6:09pm - kids - by diddlebuag - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML

#16294249
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25669) - you deserved it (3147)

On 05/22/2011 at 8:18am - misc - by Greig - United States (Ohio)

Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML

#16255885
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26601) - you deserved it (3815)

On 05/19/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by forkmylife (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, on my Facebook, the stripper my ex husband cheated on me with showed up in the "People You May Know" box. FML

#16169595
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36326) - you deserved it (2946)

On 05/14/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

#16161351
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32255) - you deserved it (7684)

On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom and I had an argument about my laziness. We did this as I was eating uncooked rice because I didn't want to have to walk to the kitchen and put it into the microwave. FML

#16104577
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5890) - you deserved it (65641)

On 05/09/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by wtfseriously (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I work at McDonald's. The entire crew, myself included, got visibly excited that we had new trash cans and dust pans. FML

#16063941
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (5835)

On 05/06/2011 at 1:15am - work - by Tyler (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML

#16043135
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34620) - you deserved it (3018)

On 05/04/2011 at 10:50am - love - by ohmylantis (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff legs, when an elderly spectator taunted, "Oohhh yeah, that's it! Massage those legs good, boy!" She looked about 70. FML

#15919634
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25651) - you deserved it (4259)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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