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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, I woke up and decided to make my mom a special Easter breakfast in bed. I pre-heated the oven to bake the sausage just the way she likes. Guess where my easter basket was. FML

#19429036
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (6210)

On 04/08/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by jess - United States (Ohio)

Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML

#19379891
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21541) - you deserved it (3060)

On 03/31/2012 at 12:22am - health - by GetHardOrGoHome - United States (Ohio)

Today, was the first day of my new job. My boss admitted that they hadn't cleaned the employee bathroom for over two months. My first task: clean the employee bathroom. FML

#19343109
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (1753)

On 03/25/2012 at 3:12am - misc - by LesToiliettes - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was laying down in bed when my puppy decided to bite my ear. As I started laughing and pulling him off I noticed one of my $200 earrings got pulled off with it. And now I wait. FML

#19293168
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28703) - you deserved it (4897)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:16am - misc - by lizzie1833 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31963) - you deserved it (4417)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

#19195188
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24799) - you deserved it (2090)

On 03/01/2012 at 11:17am - health - by cmoney6452 - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom". That's how he put it, anyway. FML

#19183355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29707) - you deserved it (2243)

On 02/28/2012 at 5:04pm - love - by salt. - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML

#19112130
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25520) - you deserved it (4379)

On 02/19/2012 at 12:40am - love - by Skullie - United States (Ohio)

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

#19106281
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (1664)

On 02/18/2012 at 9:20am - health - by AnastasiyaNicholas - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML

#19098452
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21164) - you deserved it (1874)

On 02/17/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, in a rush to get ready, I put on some "sexy" panties that I bought years ago. By the second hour of work, they were so tight and uncomfortable, I had to cut slits up the sides to avoid cutting off the circulation to my legs. FML

#19083998
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17636) - you deserved it (12493)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:26am - health - by too tight (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML

#19046512
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25313) - you deserved it (4180)

On 02/11/2012 at 5:19am - animals - by lulu - United States (Ohio)

Today, my little brother went through all the artistic anatomy reference books and colored in all the nipples and penises with a bright pink sharpie. These books were from the library. FML

#18957870
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21507) - you deserved it (2535)

On 01/31/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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