Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30788) - you deserved it (2506)
On 06/05/2011 at 3:00am - misc - by kyle - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was on my first blind date. We went to a fancy restaurant in the middle in the city. After using the bathroom, I came back to an empty table. He stole my purse and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31316) - you deserved it (10954)
On 05/28/2011 at 8:44am - love - by dancer_2014 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30889) - you deserved it (4374)
On 05/27/2011 at 6:09pm - kids - by diddlebuag - United States (Ohio)
Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (2884)
On 05/22/2011 at 8:18am - misc - by Greig - United States (Ohio)
Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22702) - you deserved it (3013)
On 05/19/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by forkmylife (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, on my Facebook, the stripper my ex husband cheated on me with showed up in the "People You May Know" box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35698) - you deserved it (2919)
On 05/14/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31542) - you deserved it (7622)
On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mom and I had an argument about my laziness. We did this as I was eating uncooked rice because I didn't want to have to walk to the kitchen and put it into the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5396) - you deserved it (53368)
On 05/09/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by wtfseriously (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I work at McDonald's. The entire crew, myself included, got visibly excited that we had new trash cans and dust pans. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26252) - you deserved it (5793)
On 05/06/2011 at 1:15am - work - by Tyler (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32086) - you deserved it (2477)
On 05/04/2011 at 10:50am - love - by ohmylantis (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff legs, when an elderly spectator taunted, "Oohhh yeah, that's it! Massage those legs good, boy!" She looked about 70. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21768) - you deserved it (3406)
On 04/25/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, at work, we've just hired a new load of people. As an icebreaker, we were paired up randomly and told to learn about our partner so that we can introduce them to the group. I got matched up with someone I've worked with for 4 months. Mid-conversation, I blurted out "I don't know your name." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6825) - you deserved it (18423)
On 04/21/2011 at 7:49pm - work - by Clueless (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19799) - you deserved it (3998)
On 04/14/2011 at 1:35pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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