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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29562) - you deserved it (4161)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

#19195188
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20786) - you deserved it (1795)

On 03/01/2012 at 11:17am - health - by cmoney6452 - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom". That's how he put it, anyway. FML

#19183355
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26173) - you deserved it (1991)

On 02/28/2012 at 5:04pm - love - by salt. - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML

#19112130
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21264) - you deserved it (3926)

On 02/19/2012 at 12:40am - love - by Skullie - United States (Ohio)

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

#19106281
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24710) - you deserved it (1565)

On 02/18/2012 at 9:20am - health - by AnastasiyaNicholas - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML

#19098452
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17436) - you deserved it (1608)

On 02/17/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, in a rush to get ready, I put on some "sexy" panties that I bought years ago. By the second hour of work, they were so tight and uncomfortable, I had to cut slits up the sides to avoid cutting off the circulation to my legs. FML

#19083998
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13630) - you deserved it (10315)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:26am - health - by too tight (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML

#19046512
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23255) - you deserved it (3955)

On 02/11/2012 at 5:19am - animals - by lulu - United States (Ohio)

Today, my little brother went through all the artistic anatomy reference books and colored in all the nipples and penises with a bright pink sharpie. These books were from the library. FML

#18957870
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18966) - you deserved it (2276)

On 01/31/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings, so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake of her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML

#18795582
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13472) - you deserved it (35857)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by machismo - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML

#18708494
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29918) - you deserved it (3000)

On 01/04/2012 at 6:29pm - misc - by jada - United States (Ohio)

Today, I worked 4 hours for a huge mail call to get all the troops their Christmas mail. And just like every other mail call I did not receive one package or letter. FML

#18595916
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23300) - you deserved it (1987)

On 12/24/2011 at 3:38am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

#18513189
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18041) - you deserved it (22233)

On 12/14/2011 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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