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FMLs submitted from Ohio

Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML

#19794074
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30316) - you deserved it (4063)

On 06/15/2012 at 8:00pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML

#19753882
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5275) - you deserved it (35982)

On 06/08/2012 at 4:09am - misc - by runner2731 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I told my mom I was finally going on a diet. She let me know how proud she is of me fighting temptation, by making my favorite cookies and dinner. FML

#19743960
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19968) - you deserved it (2051)

On 06/06/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML

#19720513
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21166) - you deserved it (2002)

On 06/02/2012 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I discovered that when my professor had said "For every A there will be an F," he was deadly serious. I earned a 94% mark, which in this class is known as a D. FML

#19684129
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (1739)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:34pm - misc - by dany - United States (Ohio)

Today, my neighbors got a motion sensor light that points at my window. It's so sensitive that it goes off every time an insect flies past. FML

#19601111
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19699) - you deserved it (1520)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my little sister came to me crying about how everyone calls her a bad driver. I gave her a pep talk, an encouraging hug, and told her not to listen to negativity. Five minutes later she wrecked my car. FML

#19575852
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21010) - you deserved it (7303)

On 05/05/2012 at 2:24am - misc - by 464424 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML

#19514784
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18251) - you deserved it (3668)

On 04/23/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by leprechaun23 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML

#19510821
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17774) - you deserved it (25155)

On 04/22/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by stoggie96 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up and decided to make my mom a special Easter breakfast in bed. I pre-heated the oven to bake the sausage just the way she likes. Guess where my easter basket was. FML

#19429036
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26267) - you deserved it (6007)

On 04/08/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by jess - United States (Ohio)

Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML

#19379891
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20173) - you deserved it (2924)

On 03/31/2012 at 12:22am - health - by GetHardOrGoHome - United States (Ohio)

Today, was the first day of my new job. My boss admitted that they hadn't cleaned the employee bathroom for over two months. My first task: clean the employee bathroom. FML

#19343109
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21473) - you deserved it (1740)

On 03/25/2012 at 3:12am - misc - by LesToiliettes - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was laying down in bed when my puppy decided to bite my ear. As I started laughing and pulling him off I noticed one of my $200 earrings got pulled off with it. And now I wait. FML

#19293168
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27255) - you deserved it (4712)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:16am - misc - by lizzie1833 - United States (Ohio)



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