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FMLs submitted from North Carolina

Today, I couldn't shut a drawer in my kitchen, because an oven mitt was blocking it. An oven mitt filled with tin-foil wrapped electronics. My Mom believes Internet hackers can get into her digital camera and prepaid cell phone, and apparently tin-foil will prevent that. FML

#17102276
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22958) - you deserved it (1913)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by BelleCharmante (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, marks the seventh day of having my nose pierced. I'd done everything I was supposed to do, even sleeping with a band-aid over it. This morning, I woke up to my piercing being ripped out by my pillow, and the band-aid nowhere in sight. FML

#17041171
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29387) - you deserved it (13247)

On 07/09/2011 at 2:00pm - misc - by meggiemouse - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized I have no life after I created a fake Facebook account, posted an insulting message on my wall, and then engaged in a vicious argument with it, just so I could impress my friends. FML

#17026908
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10273) - you deserved it (51909)

On 07/08/2011 at 10:57am - misc - by jen - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

#16531182
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50367) - you deserved it (3717)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:00pm - misc - by Danielle - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

#16017618
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40152) - you deserved it (3952)

On 05/02/2011 at 9:51am - health - by megomania (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

#15991083
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32218) - you deserved it (21256)

On 04/30/2011 at 1:50pm - health - by Laci (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

#15974140
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44342) - you deserved it (3337)

On 04/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a tornado watch has been instituted in my town. At this moment, I have violent diarrhea, and my toilet sits right in front of a window. FML

#15962941
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29839) - you deserved it (3792)

On 04/28/2011 at 12:51pm - health - by cnamobi - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a letter from my mother-in-law stating that demons made her spread rumors about me all over my hometown before my wedding. FML

#15866600
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31382) - you deserved it (2120)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by doomed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss friend requested me on Facebook. My profile picture is of me licking his employee of the month picture for a dare. FML

#15796408
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9921) - you deserved it (46836)

On 04/15/2011 at 3:51pm - work - by asdfjkl (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML

#15779610
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14988) - you deserved it (28348)

On 04/14/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by wowimscrewed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized I've been sinking into a deep depression, ignoring all my friends, and don't know what to do with my life anymore. This is all because I gave up Facebook for lent. FML

#15515343
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15493) - you deserved it (51288)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

#15441546
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11020) - you deserved it (41553)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by PFCdavila (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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