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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, my entire family sat down in the living room to watch the video I recorded of my sister's graduation from college. I never pressed record. FML

#25578
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10648) - you deserved it (38034)

On 02/11/2009 at 2:24pm - misc - by red button - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML

#24997
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32558) - you deserved it (7689)

On 02/11/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by seriously?! (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML

#22263
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44114) - you deserved it (15322)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

#21808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10898) - you deserved it (68378)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a ticket. From my dad the cop. FML

#19088
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37189) - you deserved it (15017)

On 02/09/2009 at 10:59pm - misc - by annoyed (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for our 8 month anniversary, my boyfriend bought me a hideous necklace with ugly charms hanging off it. I wore it anyway and got a rash from it on the side of my neck. After seeing the rash my boyfriend accused me of having a hickey from another guy and broke up with me. FML

#16292
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62176) - you deserved it (4174)

On 02/08/2009 at 11:10pm - misc - by Jenny (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML

#13786
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33878) - you deserved it (2367)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years sent me a text messages saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML

#10627
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62305) - you deserved it (2631)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:29pm - misc - by nycgirl424 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered in my house a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer except me. FML

#9673
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26615) - you deserved it (7347)

On 02/05/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Tori (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered my mom has over 20 sites bookmarked on her laptop, all having to do with 'How To Boost Your Insecure Teen's Confidence' or 'How To Help Your Overweight Teen Have A Positive Self Image'. Thanks, mommy. FML

#8629
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28697) - you deserved it (6170)

On 02/04/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML

#7921
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32579) - you deserved it (6105)

On 02/04/2009 at 12:04pm - love - by fml_for_real - United States (New York)



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