Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26863) - you deserved it (4785)
On 02/04/2009 at 12:04pm - love - by fml_for_real - United States (New York)
Today, I showed my boyfriend a picture of me in what I thought was a sexy skintight dress. He responded by saying "it's ok, I went through a pudgy stage too". The picture was from Saturday night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21467) - you deserved it (2991)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:38pm - love - by Sam - United States (New York)
Today, after a late night at a bar, I stepped into my building's elevator with a Chinese man who was carrying a plastic bag. Without thinking, I said, "Oooh, are you still delivering?" His response was, "I live here." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4852) - you deserved it (37066)
On 02/03/2009 at 2:57pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)
Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32861) - you deserved it (5309)
On 02/03/2009 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by ally (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend asked me to get her new clothes. She's gone from a size 4 to a size 12 during our relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23716) - you deserved it (8219)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:47am - love - by damnit (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I had just opened up some porn on my laptop when my mom walked into my room, so I slammed the laptop shut. I didn't know the speakers continue to function after the laptop is closed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12439) - you deserved it (35303)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:24am - intimacy - by hitmutefirst (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I am going to an event where I will be meeting quite a few people who will be excellent contacts in my future career. Since I wanted to make a good impression, I did the whole makeup and grooming thing before setting out, I accidentally removed about half my left eyebrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13294) - you deserved it (5347)
On 02/02/2009 at 8:10pm - work - by wiseoldone - United States (New York)
Today, I was standing on a desk at work to run wiring in a suspended ceiling, since we have no ladder. My phone rang, I rushed to answer it, tripping and smashing my leg. It was my boss, calling to tell me he was bringing over a ladder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13789) - you deserved it (2385)
On 02/01/2009 at 7:11pm - work - by fonsui - United States (New York)
Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56462) - you deserved it (4785)
On 02/01/2009 at 5:53am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4251) - you deserved it (57539)
On 01/31/2009 at 6:48am - love - by jeesh - United States (New York)
Today, I found my drunken roommate asleep in my bed, naked, after he'd peed himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17606) - you deserved it (931)
On 01/30/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by shit - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my assistant is now my manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19719) - you deserved it (1680)
On 01/30/2009 at 5:57pm - work - by thatsillegal - United States (New York)
Today, the dentist had to give me a lot of novacaine because my mouth wasn't becoming numb. After the 4th time the entire right side of my mouth was numb, except for the 2 teeth getting worked on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19457) - you deserved it (898)
On 01/30/2009 at 12:05pm - health - by ihateeverything - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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