FMLs submitted from New York

Today, I got in a hotel elevator. There was a kid in there also. He got off on the 3rd floor. As he was stepping from the elevator, he decided to press every single button. It's a 35 floor hotel. My room is on the 32nd floor. FML

by w0rstdayever / 11/27/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (New York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I complained to my boyfriend that I was stressed out. He asked me then "What do you have to be stressed out about?" I work 50 hours a week and go to school full time. I ask him what was stressful about his day, he told me that his "kill/death ratio went down on Call of Duty". FML

by amy1023 / 11/26/2009 at 5:18am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I finally received a paycheck for the first time in six months. I celebrated by promptly falling down a flight of stairs and losing consciousness. FML

by DBR / 11/23/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

by TheGirl / 11/23/2009 at 4:11pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I went onto the treadmill at my gym. When it prompted me to enter my age I put 27. I'm 29 and am lying about my age to a workout machine. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2009 at 4:54am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter was playing outside. I was watching her from the window, and I saw her pick up a dead bird. I ran outside to grab her. As I picked her up and started scolding her, she tried to scratch my face. In the attempt, her hand went straight into my mouth. FML

by gbabyy / 11/21/2009 at 10:25pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I realized that my girlfriend had never said anything about the proposal ring I had put into a box of her Froot Loops. When I hinted it to her, she said that the cereal had expired, so she threw out the box. FML

by frootloops / 11/21/2009 at 4:44pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was watching the episode where Spongebob smashes his guitar while playing. I walk into the kitchen to make him a snack, and I hear a loud crash... My nephew smashing my brand new guitar to be like Spongebob. FML

by maxus / 11/19/2009 at 9:37am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad came home from Vegas. Today, my college savings account is down by $64,000. FML

by screwed / 11/18/2009 at 10:31pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML

by Grad2010 / 11/18/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, me, a coworker, and my manager were looking at random advertisements. One ad was a picture of three fishes. My coworker named the three fishes what I thought were completely random names. I said "those are stupid names." Turns out those are my manager's kid's names. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2009 at 10:43pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I got a card from the jewelry store thanking me for purchasing an engagement ring a year ago and wishing me and my fiancée a long and everlasting marriage. Too bad my fiancée took off with the pizza delivery boy 6 months ago. FML

by figures / 11/16/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, some obnoxious guys started calling me ugly. I tried to ignore them and be the bigger person. That's pretty hard to do when they start throwing rocks at you. FML

by x0SoReckless0x / 11/16/2009 at 6:39am / United States (New York) / Kids