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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML

#3669830
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57730) - you deserved it (4626)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I moved in with my brother to save on a swanky apartment. I was skeptical as to how this would work out as we fought a lot as kids. Our first big fight? Whether or not to keep his dorm-style futon complete with Return of the Jedi sheets. He's a 35-yr old physician; I'm a 28-yr old lawyer. FML

#3669559
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34664) - you deserved it (9986)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by bdiddy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML

#3658638
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40640) - you deserved it (9050)

On 07/11/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by RR (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing tennis with my friend. He hit a ball up high, and I slammed it down, thinking there was no way he would get it. Feeling pretty good about it, I turned around to celebrate. As I turned around, I got smacked in my face. He got it. FML

#3655783
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6690) - you deserved it (50276)

On 07/11/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Name (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after buying dinner from the supermarket, I had the change in my hand, and my wallet. In the parking lot, a quarter fell out of my hand, and right next to the street drain. As I went to pick it up, my wallet fell down the drain. FML

#3600648
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44607) - you deserved it (9784)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to find a BMW partially blocking my driveway. I was already having a bad day, and was upset that some stuck up fool blocked my driveway, so I keyed the driver's side. 5 minutes later my parents show up. The BMW was a graduation gift for me. FML

#3553930
414 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22091) - you deserved it (214852)

On 07/07/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Stoopid (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend came over to talk. She just got back from a small vacation. She asked me to feed her dogs while she was gone, so I did. I even stayed with them at times so they wouldnt get lonely. My girlfriend had come over to break up with me. She didn't do so earlier because she needed her dogs fed. FML

#3529390
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54480) - you deserved it (2745)

On 07/06/2009 at 4:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a major accident then stopped to help the drivers. I was on my way to a rest stop to use the bathroom so as we were waiting for police I went into the woods and I come out to the police arresting me for public urination. One of the drivers said I was "using the woods for a bathroom." FML

#3528388
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40443) - you deserved it (3942)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:34pm - misc - by JMU (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was snuggling in bed with my girlfriend. She was depressed, so I complimented her strong legs, saying they were "like a horse." I spent the next hour and a half trying to stop her crying. FML

#3517987
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12450) - you deserved it (70675)

On 07/06/2009 at 12:03am - love - by Seabiscuit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking around town with the girl I have loved for four years and have been 100% faithful to. A girl thought it would be funny to approach me and pretend she was the girl I was seeing, and that I was cheating on her. My girlfriend believed her and broke up with me. FML

#3496673
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75375) - you deserved it (3996)

On 07/05/2009 at 1:59am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, it was my boyfriend and my six-month anniversary. I've really fallen in love with him, and I know he loves me the same. So I got him a really nice gift, a watch he's had his eye on for as long as I've known him. It was expensive. What does he get me? A condom. Three actually. FML

#3495004
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43184) - you deserved it (8727)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was helping my friend with her little sister's birthday party. We were playing a game where you get up and switch seats if you've done a certain thing. One girl said to switch if you've kissed a boy. I watched as 18 12-year-olds switched seats with each other. I stayed sitting. I'm 17. FML

#3457854
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47785) - you deserved it (8304)

On 07/03/2009 at 4:09pm - love - by neverbeenkissed (woman) - United States (New York)



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