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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, when I got to work, I found out that I was being laid off. Two hours later, I found out my boss had my name on the wrong list. I was elated. I went to lunch, and on the way back was rear ended in the rain. I was an hour and a half late getting back to work. I was fired upon returning. FML

#5568321
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40040) - you deserved it (2941)

On 09/30/2009 at 5:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was preparing to perform with my marching band at a competition. Right before we went on, a tuba player friend of mine offered to help me stretch. He wound up snapping my bra. I'm a drum major, and had to conduct the entire show while my boobs were falling out. FML

#5510912
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39111) - you deserved it (5393)

On 09/27/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by commando - United States (New York)

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

#5486035
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47987) - you deserved it (5202)

On 09/26/2009 at 2:21pm - misc - by grossgross (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, we got our progress reports. My physics teacher wrote that I don't participate in class. My mom got mad and grounded me before I could tell her that I raise my hand in class all the time but my teacher won't call on me cause he can't pronounce my name. FML

#5466683
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46253) - you deserved it (3027)

On 09/25/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Non-active (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled a bee off of my friend's dog because we were worried he could be allergic. Of course I got stung, and of course the dog wasn't allergic. Turns out I am. FML

#5463799
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37855) - you deserved it (5115)

On 09/25/2009 at 9:09am - health - by boomstick (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I missed my bus by a minute. I called up my step dad asking him if he can drive me because I had a test first period. After about calling him twenty times, and him not picking up, I see him drive by the bus stop pointing at me and laughing hysterically. FML

#5448757
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41226) - you deserved it (3856)

On 09/24/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by NotFunny (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with U2 tickets. Still no action. FML

#5441103
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13860) - you deserved it (30460)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by loveless (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided not to park in the parking garage on campus, in an attempt to save the $8 it would have cost me. Instead, I parked in a surface lot (about a mile away) and got a $50 parking ticket for not having a permit to park there. FML

#5399983
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8447) - you deserved it (40243)

On 09/21/2009 at 7:34pm - misc - by ScorpioQueen (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML

#5315969
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41367) - you deserved it (9826)

On 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by sara (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to drink the most vile and disgusting medicinal treatments I could ever imagine. Then I had to drink it again when I threw up the first batch. FML

Today, I got rejected for approximately the tenth credit card I've applied for, I called a bank to find out why. Apparently I took out a car loan in 2004 and bought a house in 2006. I was 13 in 2004. The credit report does not have any records of this. Thank you identity theft. FML

#5274091
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49381) - you deserved it (2388)

On 09/15/2009 at 3:24pm - money - by Lost (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my best friend, the man who I've been in love with for nine years, finally told me he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Unfortunately, it was while he was using me to practice proposing to his girlfriend. FML

#5269441
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52653) - you deserved it (8308)

On 09/15/2009 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her stoner, unemployed boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML

#5235406
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39151) - you deserved it (3742)

On 09/13/2009 at 7:10pm - kids - by Broeman (man) - United States (New York)



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