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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML

#20999827
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43682) - you deserved it (3459)

On 12/21/2013 at 1:26am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I managed to infect a clean computer with a virus while looking up info on how to rid my other computer of the same virus. FML

#20992711
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34145) - you deserved it (6895)

On 12/14/2013 at 8:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45427) - you deserved it (6891)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that I am bleeding from my cervix and must refrain from having sex for the next two weeks. My fiancé pointedly asked if my cervix has anything to do with my mouth. FML

#20987856
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47400) - you deserved it (9296)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years old. FML

#20987666
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38093) - you deserved it (7833)

On 12/10/2013 at 1:04pm - love - by Somerandomguy64 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49650) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my 4-year-old daughter stood up to a bully in the mall. I was the one who was getting bullied. FML

#20979326
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39702) - you deserved it (7045)

On 12/03/2013 at 12:33pm - kids - by DocShadow (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a S.W.A.T team raided my apartment. The reason? My landlord watched a documentary about serial killers. I work at a daycare center. FML

#20979196
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38130) - you deserved it (2465)

On 12/03/2013 at 8:24am - misc - by pois0n (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to write him a poem, as I am an avid writer. Happily, I agreed. After hours of working, I proudly presented it to him. He read it, laughed, and said, "No babe, I meant a real poem." Maybe I should rethink my career choice. FML

#20977444
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36074) - you deserved it (3426)

On 12/01/2013 at 8:57pm - love - by bad poet (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

#20974953
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24300) - you deserved it (36491)

On 11/29/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by holy sleet (man) - United States (New York)

Today, with my name sounding vaguely like 'Turkey' and being in the phonebook for business purposes, people keep calling, offering to stuff me for Thanksgiving. FML

#20973255
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34596) - you deserved it (3025)

On 11/28/2013 at 1:26am - animals - by NotTellingYouMyName (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML

#20971381
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41897) - you deserved it (4351)

On 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after having some drinks at the club, I went home with this awesome girl. When I woke up, I thought the house looked really familiar. It belonged to my ex's younger sister. FML

#20970124
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45151) - you deserved it (16444)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by sister sister - United States (New York)



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