Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from New York

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (7888)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that the only thing more disgusting than watching a little kid shove their finger up their nose and eat their fresh green mucus is watching your grandmother do the same. FML

#20011258
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20124) - you deserved it (1642)

On 08/09/2012 at 10:51am - health - by MsConfusedd - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the hospital due to extreme sickness. My boyfriend saw this as an opportune time to take another girl out since I was "otherwise preoccupied." FML

#19989704
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24072) - you deserved it (2033)

On 07/28/2012 at 9:21pm - love - by cheaterscheat (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML

#19984576
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (3571)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:04am - misc - by Just Me (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33033) - you deserved it (4638)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got on a two hour train ride to go to a concert. I had been so caught up in handling the train tickets that halfway to the concert, I realized I had left the concert tickets on my dresser. FML

#19981303
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (7893)

On 07/24/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by sirensaresexy - United States (New York)

Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML

#19971025
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28920) - you deserved it (3068)

On 07/21/2012 at 10:30pm - health - by Luna - United States (New York)

Today, I shaved my legs for the first time in three weeks. It took half an hour, three disposable razors, and I cut my legs up so badly they look worse then they did when they were hairy. FML

#19940752
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8672) - you deserved it (28574)

On 07/15/2012 at 10:42am - misc - by Taylor - United States (New York)

Today, I spent my entire paycheck on a new summer wardrobe. I then left my shopping bags on the train. FML

#19925066
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14530) - you deserved it (32919)

On 07/11/2012 at 8:02pm - money - by Ashley - United States (New York)

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

#19905936
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25135) - you deserved it (3349)

On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

#19894625
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19700) - you deserved it (1831)

On 07/05/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML

#19883024
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19223) - you deserved it (6093)

On 07/02/2012 at 9:53pm - misc - by 21! (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

#19881608
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31734) - you deserved it (4925)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by nobrony (man) - United States (New York)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: