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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, I got stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. I had to reach into my small trash can and use soiled toilet paper to clean myself. When I went to flush the toilet, I noticed three unused rolls of toilet paper sitting on the counter. FML

Today, I read an article about the top 10 worst jobs this year. This list includes my degree and three of my main skills and interests. FML

#20921448
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44042) - you deserved it (5147)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:51am - work - by collegegrad (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother finally informed me that our shower head has an option to make the water only come out of the detachable part. My left leg's been in a cast for 4 months, and the whole time I've had to shower sitting backwards with my leg sticking out the door. He knew. FML

Today, I was working a kid's birthday party dressed as a clown. The child's mother made me change because he was scared of clowns. The only thing I had in my car was a princess costume that was owned by a girl co-worker. So for 4 hours I had to entertain in a tight pink dress. I'm a guy. FML

#20913049
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (4471)

On 10/08/2013 at 9:19pm - kids - by Allycat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend was rubbing my leg. He started laughing and said, "Babe, is this your leg, or am I petting Daisy?" Daisy is my dog. I need to shave. FML

#20910814
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27673) - you deserved it (37481)

On 10/07/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by loserllamalick (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

Today, my mom and I got the answer to the question, "Is our dog really dumb enough to jump out of the window of a moving vehicle?" The answer: Yes. FML

#20904318
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42736) - you deserved it (5880)

On 10/02/2013 at 2:36am - animals - by BasketGhost - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the nice guy who comes to my workplace every morning to bring me a smoothie also makes a point of putting his knob in it before giving it to me. Also, all my coworkers knew about this and think it's hilarious. FML

#20895155
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44213) - you deserved it (4167)

On 09/24/2013 at 11:51pm - work - by littledipper - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML

#20894598
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34253) - you deserved it (4312)

On 09/24/2013 at 5:01pm - kids - by mandm - United States (New York)

Today, I had to show my daughter where the USA is on a map. She's 17, and we live in the USA. FML

#20889279
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43449) - you deserved it (9987)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at a family party, my uncles were complimenting my mom on her pies. I cooked them. She took all the credit. FML

#20883979
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41276) - you deserved it (3224)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:03pm - misc - by zachadams - United States (New York)

Today, my son asked me if slavery was ever abolished. He's 19. FML

#20883742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41974) - you deserved it (6738)

On 09/16/2013 at 1:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the guy on the floor above me decided it was time for a tuba jam session. Apparently optimal tuba time is 2am. FML

#20881873
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40149) - you deserved it (2687)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by sleeplessinrichmond - United States (New York)



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