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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, I walked into the house only to be greeted by the strongest smell of dung. I asked my mom about it, and it turns out she's been airing these strange herbs throughout the house, most of which are in my bedroom. She won't let me open the window. FML

#19015871 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (5208) - you deserved it (415)

On 02/07/2012 at 1:38am - misc - by whyme (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML

#19006098 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (7628) - you deserved it (782)

On 02/05/2012 at 11:09pm - misc - by dadadoo - United States (New York)

Today, I got an early Valentine's day card. My boyfriend and I recently broke up, and my hopes shot up thinking it might be from him. It wasn't. It was from my parents. FML

#18993320 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (5886) - you deserved it (1081)

On 02/04/2012 at 3:46pm - love - by Arp (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML

#18988711 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (2334) - you deserved it (6706)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by WayTooMuchFacebook (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

#18972343 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (5218) - you deserved it (2154)

On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)

Today, my sister set it so all the Yahoo articles I read are published on my Facebook wall. This would have been fine had I not decided to read, "Does the gynecologist care if you shave?" FML

#18957041 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (6550) - you deserved it (1348)

On 01/30/2012 at 10:54pm - misc - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I spent two hours perfecting a really romantic text message to my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. I listed all the things I loved about him, and recalled some of our best times together. Two minutes after I sent it, he replied, "Huh?" FML

#18954605 (198)

I agree, your life sucks (6039) - you deserved it (2844)

On 01/30/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by upupandaway (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend started a month-long period of not talking to me. One of her male friends, who is a self-styled astrologist, told her there are "bad omens" in our relationship for the coming weeks. I don't know if I should dump her for being gullible or just plain stupid. FML

#18943395 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (6692) - you deserved it (837)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

#18896901 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (3498) - you deserved it (6244)

On 01/24/2012 at 3:50am - intimacy - by elisimo - United States (New York)

Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML

#18876048 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (10752) - you deserved it (587)

On 01/22/2012 at 12:09am - kids - by thosedamnkids (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out the guy that my girlfriend introduced as her brother was actually her boyfriend. I also paid for him to come out with us to the movies several times. FML

#18869027 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (11436) - you deserved it (1026)

On 01/21/2012 at 8:25am - love - by addicted2v - United States (New York)

Today, I watched The Omen with my father. Halfway through driving me back home, he stopped the car and made me get out right there in a rough part of town. Fifteen minutes later, he drove up beside me, laughed hysterically at how terrified I was, and told me to get in. FML

#18864677 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (7464) - you deserved it (654)

On 01/20/2012 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML

#18799303 (352)

I agree, your life sucks (5984) - you deserved it (12819)

On 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm - kids - by me (man) - United States (New York)