Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from New South Wales

Today, I was on a standing on a crowded bus going home after school. A wriggling 5 year old boy and his mum left the seat to get off the bus. Since no one looked keen to sit on the seat, I did, only to find out that it was covered in pee. FML

#280040
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48443) - you deserved it (10239)

On 03/12/2009 at 7:09am - misc - by Noname - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking along the street and passed a young couple. Over my shoulder I heard the girl say to her boyfriend "Would you still love me if I looked like her?" FML

#232729
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (165876) - you deserved it (10327)

On 03/07/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by Pissed Off (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I did my work, the work of my co-worker who called in sick and the work of my boss who has no idea what the hell is going on all at the same time. I didn't get a promotion because I don't work hard enough. FML

#101471
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39843) - you deserved it (2769)

On 02/22/2009 at 1:14am - work - by Noname (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a meeting at work. My boss was there as well as her boss, and a few other managers and directors. We started discussing politics in the context of our latest project. I tried to say "erratic election". I almost succeeded. FML

#12756
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22486) - you deserved it (5241)

On 02/07/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Flubber (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I downloaded the 'Dark was the Night' compilation made for charity. I have no soul. FML

#2527
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4173) - you deserved it (21543)

On 01/25/2009 at 12:52pm - misc - by Champs - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finally finished my 500 page manuscript and so went out to buy some paper to print it off. I get back home and find out my dad has infected my computer with a virus and the only way to save it was to wipe the hard drive, which he did. That script took me a year and I have no backup. FML

#2406
5 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35950) - you deserved it (23623)

On 01/24/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by David3000 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my feet smell. He was in the next room at the time. FML

#2293
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15547) - you deserved it (6792)

On 01/23/2009 at 7:04am - love - by sadass - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while on a date with the guy of my dreams, I cut my tongue so bad it bled for an hour. I managed to cut it on the plastic spoon from my coffee. FML

#1689
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18656) - you deserved it (2415)

On 01/19/2009 at 12:32am - health - by spoony - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML

#1678
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27235) - you deserved it (11267)

On 01/18/2009 at 10:20pm - intimacy - by gjh - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I logged on to Facebook for the first time in nine days. No new notifications. FML

#1529
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19973) - you deserved it (7743)

On 01/18/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by zuut - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at a party, I watched the guy I've liked for AGES come out of a bedroom with one of my gay male friends. They were in there for a while. FML

#1485
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23495) - you deserved it (2480)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:17pm - love - by C2 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML

#1459
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5743) - you deserved it (35714)

On 01/17/2009 at 1:41pm - health - by zaneey - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after seeing a girl for a few weeks on and off I sent her a text to see if she wanted to go out the next saturday. Predictive text changed "go" to "in". So..."Why don't we in out on saturday?" She stopped calling me. FML

#612
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19035) - you deserved it (4121)

On 12/30/2008 at 11:53am - love - by Noname - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: