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FMLs submitted from New South Wales

Today, in a desperate attempt to get my business "out there", I dropped a few of my cards on a station floor. I got a call, even a quote. A $500 fine from the transit for public littering. FML

#17837953
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9189) - you deserved it (29441)

On 09/26/2011 at 7:46am - money - by Sam - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after months of grueling training and countless early mornings, I finally began the race I had been preparing for over the past year, only to slip and break my leg in the first 450 meters. FML

#17827481
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33871) - you deserved it (2592)

On 09/25/2011 at 3:23am - health - by jc2011 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while resting in bed, I felt a slight tickle on my neck. Thinking it was a cockroach, I panicked and flung it across the bedroom. Turns out it was my brand new necklace, which is now broken into dozens of pieces. FML

#17818802
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12477) - you deserved it (30833)

On 09/24/2011 at 4:23am - misc - by deee21 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it was my first day as a police officer. A couple of hours into the shift, we got a call. A man was drunkenly jeering and urinating on parked cars. That man turned out to be my father. FML

#17787359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36465) - you deserved it (2780)

On 09/20/2011 at 10:56am - work - by PC Jones (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML

#17752221
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5600) - you deserved it (52809)

On 09/15/2011 at 5:22pm - misc - by Cooper491 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was serving an incredibly rude woman at work. The ladder I had used to get her two pairs of shoes came crashing down, and hit my face and neck. She only bought one pair, and ten minutes later returned them after complaining they were too expensive. FML

#17687215
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25678) - you deserved it (2304)

On 09/07/2011 at 7:55am - work - by minimoonpie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I bought a new goldfish. While leaving my fish on my balcony to go get fish food, I hear a loud squawk and splash, I race outside to see a bird flying off with my fish. FML

#17603044
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13717) - you deserved it (37699)

On 08/28/2011 at 7:29am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my doctor asked for a urine sample. It's the first time I've tried to cup my own pee. Despite the fact that I'm a woman, I managed to aim wrong, and sprayed the floor, hit the door and my handbag with my own pee. FML

#17584076
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19500) - you deserved it (14570)

On 08/26/2011 at 5:09am - health - by goldengirl - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after waiting 3 months, I finally got my wedding dress back from the dry-cleaners. The dry cleaning lasted longer than the marriage. FML

#17583056
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33666) - you deserved it (8889)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:28am - love - by justmyluck - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML

#17575324
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27968) - you deserved it (4159)

On 08/25/2011 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Puppy Loverr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was dancing with the 4 hottest girls I've ever seen at a club, and I fainted. FML

#17506139
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30075) - you deserved it (7966)

On 08/18/2011 at 1:18am - health - by gb - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML

#17487298
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30801) - you deserved it (12311)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25876) - you deserved it (2534)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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