Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from New South Wales

Today, I found out that if a jock calls you a nerd in the street and you retaliate with a witty comeback, be prepared to run. Fast. FML

#18911929
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25223) - you deserved it (5505)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:36pm - misc - by JMcKay (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML

#18905780
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20606) - you deserved it (16395)

On 01/25/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Paicked (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

#18897054
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24604) - you deserved it (6911)

On 01/24/2012 at 5:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML

#18878139
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26166) - you deserved it (6548)

On 01/22/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a man crashed into my car. He then got out of his car, dug a toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, and tried to brush away the damage. FML

#18851761
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (1937)

On 01/19/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by toothpaste (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it was my first day being a full-time paramedic. I was shot in the arm. FML

#18850340
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38319) - you deserved it (2377)

On 01/19/2012 at 12:44am - work - by bad luck? - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I anxiously waited 8 hours for an important phone call. The phone rang while I was sitting on the toilet. FML

#18847720
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25678) - you deserved it (3350)

On 01/18/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by iliterallypoopedmyself (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my front house window was smashed. A note was left, saying 'I want my cat back'. I have no idea what they are talking about. FML

#18819686
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26262) - you deserved it (1907)

On 01/15/2012 at 11:17pm - misc - by James - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML

#18803544
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24371) - you deserved it (3168)

On 01/14/2012 at 6:42am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

#18673458
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32161) - you deserved it (2352)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:51am - misc - by Grandson (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend told me how depressing it is that she hasn't had sex in two weeks. I haven't had sex in 3 years. FML

#18614402
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33969) - you deserved it (5255)

On 12/26/2011 at 6:48am - intimacy - by Sally - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML

#18601417
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25219) - you deserved it (16024)

On 12/24/2011 at 8:15pm - love - by Nowajerk (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11760) - you deserved it (29348)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: