Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from New South Wales

Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML

#18172214
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23452) - you deserved it (8359)

On 11/06/2011 at 7:17am - animals - by dre_bro11 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was fired for the second time in as many days. I received a letter notifying me that I would no longer be working for the company, effective immediately. When I did not attend work the next day, I received a phone call firing me for not turning up. FML

#18153338
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23308) - you deserved it (1654)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:04am - work - by fired (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27950) - you deserved it (2907)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught my best friend in bed with my current boyfriend. Apparently watching movies naked is "the new in thing". FML

#18101426
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30656) - you deserved it (1945)

On 10/29/2011 at 3:22am - love - by backstabbed - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found my "lost" bicycle in my best friend's garage. I've been having to catch two buses to get to work for the past few months. FML

#18029940
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18953) - you deserved it (2160)

On 10/20/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by jwhizzle - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents had a fight as to which one of them is the most cultured. As a result, they've begun writing my chore lists in a variety of languages. If I don't do them, I'm grounded. I only speak English. FML

#18025150
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19078) - you deserved it (2035)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:29pm - misc - by Missy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML

#18021693
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23548) - you deserved it (2225)

On 10/19/2011 at 5:40am - misc - by targe - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was threatened with suspension from school because of my nose piercing. I had to explain that it's actually a pimple. FML

#17960494
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29267) - you deserved it (1825)

On 10/11/2011 at 4:05pm - health - by top dog! - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came home from work to find the front door wide open, the stove on, my 5 year old cutting up the curtain, and my 2 year old smearing chocolate sauce on the floor. My fiancé was nowhere to be found. Later on, I got a text from him saying that he'd gone to watch the footy. FML

Today, I was pulled over by the police. The cop was my ex-boyfriend. He had no legitimate reason to pull me over, so he thoroughly checked my car. He gave me a defect notice and a fine. What for? A broken door lock, on my rear passenger door. FML

#17927232
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25272) - you deserved it (2885)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:07am - misc - by jkass - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finished a website that I have been working on for ages for a friend. He tried to repay me by offering to teach me to play table tennis. FML

#17909983
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16484) - you deserved it (2682)

On 10/05/2011 at 6:49am - work - by Matt - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML

Today, in a desperate attempt to get my business "out there", I dropped a few of my cards on a station floor. I got a call, even a quote. A $500 fine from the transit for public littering. FML

#17837953
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7359) - you deserved it (19978)

On 09/26/2011 at 7:46am - money - by Sam - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • Sharina's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! Glad to see you all again, hope you’re doing fine and dandy. We are, amazing stuff has happened in amongst all the drudge and sludge. We’ve spent the week listening to the greatest album ever…

Friday 24 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: