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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from New Mexico

Today , I Was Re-watching Mah Wedding Video. As I Was Walking Down The Aisle , You Could Hear Mah Grandfather Mutter "Here Comes The Bride , All Fat And Wide." Mega FML

#19250410
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37767) - you deserved it (5476)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Taday I told mah mom I was going to a New Year's party . She told me to be back by midnight . FML

#18671764
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36213) - you deserved it (3063)

On 01/01/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by tooearly (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I noticd that girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML

#18613086
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29041) - you deserved it (7253)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Cary (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I rode the public bus. When I got off, I puttd my hood up only to discover that the old manho sat behind me had usd my hood as a trashcan for his gum and usd Kleenex. I can't get the gum out of my hair. real FML

#18482161
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31956) - you deserved it (2357)

On 12/11/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today.. . I realized the closest I've ever been to being hit on was with a car in the school parking lot . Even then.. . the guy claimed he "didn't notice" me . mega FML

#17983991
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24347) - you deserved it (2735)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:40pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I Was Eating Noodles. Midway Through Chewing, I Sneezed. The Noodles Got Stuck In My Nose. FML

#17718779
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27739) - you deserved it (3642)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:15am - health - by bob - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got asked out fir the first time in my life. During a prank call. By a complete stranger. FML

#16891673
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30899) - you deserved it (3884)

On 06/28/2011 at 1:35am - misc - by veebenjoo - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I putted lemon juice in my hair as a cheap an easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair an I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in looool my hair. FML

#16580988
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13898) - you deserved it (47527)

On 06/09/2011 at 4:32pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, in order to avoid seeing my ex-girlfriend in class, I changed my schedule 4 "personal reasons." Apparently she had the same idea an changed her schedule as well. We now have all the same classes together. Before, we had just two. FML

#15879148
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31350) - you deserved it (9130)

On 04/21/2011 at 9:53pm - love - by fatcat117 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

yesterday after dealing with tons of drama an working a 14 hour shift I took a shower. When I stepped out a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid which fell into the tank an broke it. Now looool my leg hurts an the bathroom's flooded. mega FML

#14969181
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30277) - you deserved it (2896)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:11am - misc - by TheKingDavis (man) - United States (New Mexico)

TODAY, I WENT TO THE GROCERY STORE WITH MAH MOM'S BOYFRIEND. WE WERE IN THE BREAD AISLE WHEN HE PICKED UP A LOAF THAT WAS IN MAH HAND, AN SAID, "NO, NO, U HAVE TO FEEL THE BREAD," AN STARTED RUBBING IT ALL OVER HIS BODY. HE'S MOVING IN NEXT WEEK. FML

#14589088
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29832) - you deserved it (3163)

On 01/15/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, in the middle of hot passionate sex with mah husband, he stops and tells me he won't be able to finish until I go brush mah teeth. real FML

#13709445
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10941) - you deserved it (36407)

On 11/04/2010 at 12:18am - intimacy - by shotdown (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting inhat they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gun point, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML

#12957877
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30106) - you deserved it (2100)

On 09/08/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by bustedfornuthin - United States (New Mexico)



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