Today, I was making love to my boyfriend on the back bumper of my car. After he finished he told me he felt like he was riding a seahorse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3708) - you totally deserved it (1045)
On 01/25/2010 at 3:36am - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18829) - you totally deserved it (1064)
On 12/25/2009 at 2:25am - misc - by sucks_brah (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6213) - you totally deserved it (28567)
On 11/24/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by yomamma787 - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39357) - you totally deserved it (1392)
On 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm - kids - by ahhahaha (man) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (39303) - you totally deserved it (17551)
On 07/21/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by uh-oh (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7268) - you totally deserved it (32987)
On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, one of my good friends confided in me about the affair she is having with our boss. She'd been sleeping with him for 3 months and told me they were in love, but it had to be kept quiet due to our company's very strict anti-fraternization policy . I'd been secretly seeing him all year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38577) - you totally deserved it (13974)
On 06/20/2009 at 1:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, while on my daily jog, I passed a very attractive girl. While passing her, she yelled "hey cutie". Trying to look cool, I tried turning around without stopping. I then fell off the curb and severely sprained my ankle. She caught up to help but was laughing the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7146) - you totally deserved it (21190)
On 06/16/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33126) - you totally deserved it (4794)
On 05/29/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I went for a hike with the local search and rescue volunteer group that I recently joined. I got lost and spent 5 hours wandering aimlessly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26986) - you totally deserved it (9470)
On 04/30/2009 at 11:13pm - misc - by Wouldntitbeniceif (man) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I drove 9 hours and took Monday off of work to surprise my Mom and Dad for Easter. They weren't home so I called to tell them the surprise, rather than wait. They didn't answer as they were on a flight to Denver to surprise me for Easter since "I couldn't get off work." FML
I agree, your life sucks (53686) - you totally deserved it (8228)
On 04/13/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by traveller (man) - United States (New Mexico)
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