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FMLs submitted from New Jersey

Today , I was working in the box office. A group came in 4 tickets but wantd to pay individually. One paid $40 4 a $25 ticket. Laughing , I reachd 4 the calculator while saying , "I went to public school , so I can't do math." They didn't laugh. They were all teachers in public schools. mega FML

#4379266
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14853) - you deserved it (50869)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:02am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

yesterday the car I was in got pulld over by the police for making an illegal turn . I was in a cab . And he kept the meter running . FML

#4362342
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47206) - you deserved it (2643)

On 08/07/2009 at 2:29pm - misc - by LT (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I learnd a valuable lesson, never leave yur "Let It Be" album, wic u paid $489 4 on Ebay out on yur desk . My broter also learnd someting, old records make 4 very breakable, one use frisbees . FML

#4293137
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41224) - you deserved it (10935)

On 08/04/2009 at 9:37pm - money - by DiskJockey (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today , I was just about to get in the shower , when I heard a loud crunch. I thought to myself , boy the neighbours next door must be doing some heavy construction. Two seconds after that thought , my brother knocked on the door to inform me that the neighbours tree had just fallen on my car. FML

#4251731
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45227) - you deserved it (2097)

On 08/03/2009 at 8:43am - misc - by Jaybird1587 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, as my son carrid the cage with live food 4 his pet lizards up the stars, I heard the sound of 2,500 babby crickets escaping.

#4239314
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47548) - you deserved it (6020)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:29pm - animals - by cricketeer (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I plannd a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invitd all his friend and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I calld to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML

#4215163
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61239) - you deserved it (3713)

On 08/01/2009 at 9:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, My Mom Asked Me If I Was Crying Cuz My Boyfriend Cheated On Me With My Best Friend. That Wasn't Why I Was Crying. My Mom Knows Things Before I Do. FML

#4147404
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50597) - you deserved it (2733)

On 07/29/2009 at 11:20pm - love - by screwed (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took the bus to Boston. My bike is in Boston. My bike lock is in Boston. The key is in New York. FML

#4035299
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14046) - you deserved it (33743)

On 07/25/2009 at 6:17pm - misc - by zinka - United States (New Jersey)

Today , I opanad soma small cuta brthday gifts at mah boyfriand's housa. As wa laft to go out , ha slippad ma a Tiffany box and said ha wantad ma to opan it in privata. Flushad and axcitad , I opan it to fina a ziploc fillad with hair. It was his mustacha I had baan bagging him to shava fir months. FML

#3997843
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35254) - you deserved it (19028)

On 07/24/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

2day I had an important powerpoint presentation for ALL the big execs at work!! It seems that during my lunch break, my boyfriend IMed me on my mac saying "Feeling so horny right now, come home for a quicky lyk last week?" I didn't see it until the presentation!! So did the executives!! FML

#3899297
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35877) - you deserved it (9533)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:07am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today , during some previews before the new Harry Potter movie , a guy stood up and led the audience in an enthusiastic and rather successful chant "H-A-R-R-Y!". Minutes later when I attempted to do the same thing , I was pelted with half-full bags of popcorn , freezing sodas , and booing. fat FML

#3897679
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10597) - you deserved it (77553)

On 07/20/2009 at 1:54am - misc - by Chelsea (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, After Not Seieng Mah Boyfriend 4 9 Months, He Came To Meet Me At The Arport . I Was So Excitedhen I Frst Saw Him That I Broke Into A Sprint To Greet Him . Apparently, Running Through The Arport Looks Suspicious, Because A Security Guard Tackled Me . Now I Have A Broken Nose . Fat FML

#3878343
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51458) - you deserved it (6830)

On 07/19/2009 at 9:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I usd a public bathroom. I hung mah purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door an steals mah purse. I got robbedhile taking a crap. FML

#3862614
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47383) - you deserved it (7291)

On 07/18/2009 at 6:32pm - misc - by xobeachbabi428ox - United States (New Jersey)



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