Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M and M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34863) - you deserved it (10365)
On 02/08/2011 at 11:57am - love - by Username - United States (Nevada)
Today, I went to school prepared to speak in front of a whole bunch of kids and talk about how great my middle school is. I spent an hour on the speech and took the 45 minute drive there. Turns out the coordinator of the school only called me in to pass out brochures. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14532) - you deserved it (3066)
On 01/09/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by sureloved97 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19808) - you deserved it (4168)
On 12/16/2010 at 1:32am - health - by nukebroadcast - United States (Nevada)
Today, my toddler stood up in the shopping cart and fell giving himself a black eye. Later while at a restaurant he tried to stand up in his highchair. I quickly blurted out "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. Now the waiter wont stop glaring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33210) - you deserved it (7633)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35471) - you deserved it (2679)
On 12/04/2010 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted get to know my mom, so they went off and had a chat. After an hour, I noticed my girlfriend was gone and my mom was waiting for me. Apparently I've been dumped through my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23404) - you deserved it (1848)
On 12/02/2010 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I went to the place I signed for yesterday to pay the first month's rent and get my keys. I looked around before I left, and used the toilet. I went back later to show my boyfriend and found the place flooded an inch with water coming from the toilet. It had been flooding for 7 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15511) - you deserved it (2886)
On 11/11/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by robbyrabbit (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49164) - you deserved it (9961)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I gave my two weeks notice at work. My boss sighed with relief and muttered, "Thank God." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16013) - you deserved it (4438)
On 10/13/2010 at 12:42pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I got in an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19771) - you deserved it (3297)
On 09/22/2010 at 4:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17483) - you deserved it (19055)
On 08/20/2010 at 5:51am - intimacy - by pathetic (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, while at my friend's house, I noticed her brother had a bit of an accent. I laughingly said "Is it me or does your little brother have an accent?" She stared and replied with "No, he has autism." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10943) - you deserved it (31839)
On 08/12/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by kggggg - United States (Nevada)
Today, I realized that my baby stops crying loudly whenever I turn on the vacuum cleaner. I'm either stuck with a fussy baby all day, or the roaring sound of a vacuum cleaner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18062) - you deserved it (3578)
On 05/14/2010 at 1:01am - misc - by superhero1043 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Friday 24 May 2013
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