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FMLs submitted from Nevada

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

Today, I had to explain to my grandmother why, "What a nice singing voice! He doesn't sound black at all!" is not a compliment. FML

#21336801
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31948) - you deserved it (2761)

On 01/14/2015 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, it's my 40th birthday. I got two presents by mail: a jar of wrinkle cream from a market research company, and an ad from a funeral home. FML

#21329484
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30885) - you deserved it (2408)

On 01/02/2015 at 5:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I decided to start jogging and exercising, so I had a wonderful workout before work. Then I broke my foot at work. Goodbye exercising. FML

#21327143
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27012) - you deserved it (2348)

On 12/30/2014 at 12:24pm - health - by mikki bee - United States (Nevada)

Today, I spent well over an hour waiting for customer service to assist me with my forgotten password, only to realize, 5 minutes into the conversation, that I had never created an account in the first place. FML

#21317146
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17296) - you deserved it (26724)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, after spending a lazy day at home, I went to UPS with my mom to help her pick up a package. While in line, she sent me back to the car because I'm, "an embarrassment to be around" when I'm not wearing makeup. FML

#21314671
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30864) - you deserved it (2762)

On 12/09/2014 at 8:56pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

#21312305
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33918) - you deserved it (3305)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:18am - work - by ring-a-ding-ding (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after a few weeks of my dad setting up glue traps in the garage to trap mice, I found out what it's like to have a pigeon wander in and get its foot stuck on one. FML

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39957) - you deserved it (3438)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had to sit through yet another one of my mom's, "You need to grow and gain some weight!" rants. I'm 22 and she doesn't believe me when I tell her I'm done growing. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting past 5'2". FML

#21223478
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43371) - you deserved it (3632)

On 07/29/2014 at 4:27am - misc - by Tiny (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mother compared having me as a daughter to having a deadly kind of cancer. FML

#21213727
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44681) - you deserved it (4879)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:53am - misc - by wtf? - United States (Nevada)

Today, I helped my dad push our broken-down truck from the driveway onto the tire ramp. Truck didn't make it; neither did my leg. FML

#21202583
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42944) - you deserved it (4094)

On 07/08/2014 at 4:40am - misc - by crippled (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

#21192543
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63401) - you deserved it (4945)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)



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