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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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FMLs submitted from Montana

Today, my older brother burst into my bedroom at 4 am to show me photos of sushi. FML

#18684566 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (7789) - you deserved it (888)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:18am - misc - by jku (man) - United States (Montana)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my dad walked into my room, threw some magazines on my bed, and calmly said "You left your porn in the bathroom again." FML

#18624814 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (2632) - you deserved it (10911)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by ;)loganberry(; - United States (Montana)

Today, my mother sold my extensive Star Wars collection, and I cried when I found out. I'm 46. FML

#18524241 (273)

I agree, your life sucks (8428) - you deserved it (6890)

On 12/15/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by Oja1 - United States (Montana)

Today, I lent my sister $1000 because she and her husband were in some debt. They used the money to go gambling in Vegas and won a major jackpot. They won't even give me a cut. FML

#17948553 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (10989) - you deserved it (1809)

On 10/10/2011 at 12:04am - money - by cc - United States (Montana)

Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML

#17087035 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (15416) - you deserved it (9492)

On 07/12/2011 at 11:13pm - animals - by MooCow - United States (Montana)

Today, my dad informed me that I will be staying in the bug-infested shed for the summer when I come to visit, due to his girlfriend's sewing workspace completely taking over the only room I've ever had at his house. FML

#16792540 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (23560) - you deserved it (1454)

On 06/22/2011 at 12:59am - health - by justinj360 - United States (Montana)

Today, to punish me for being hungover, my roommate blasted the bagpipe version of "Amazing Grace" through his stereo. FML

#15128708 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (8833) - you deserved it (21885)

On 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm - misc - by jm_track - United States (Montana)

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (9541) - you deserved it (33656)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I got married. Tonight, I received the best orgasm of my life. Not from my husband; from the jacuzzi tub in our honeymoon suite, where he was passed out drunk. FML

#14170745 (175)

I agree, your life sucks (26784) - you deserved it (3363)

On 12/11/2010 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my cat brought yet another chipmunk into our house. She never kills them, so they stay in our house until we either capture them or they escape. So far, she's brought in three squirrels, four chipmunks, four mice, and a snake. FML

#9805179 (398)

I agree, your life sucks (25165) - you deserved it (4661)

On 04/11/2010 at 3:11pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I met at a masquerade. The moment he saw me without my mask on, he left the date. FML

#8892193 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (17154) - you deserved it (2025)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:38pm - misc - by workinggirl (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, while at McDonald's, I saw an 8 year old girl licking a life-size Ronald McDonald sitting on a bench. Being concerned, I told her mother who then yelled at me for 10 minutes for being a "paedophile" and "being turned on by an 8 year old girl." FML

#8781729 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (18900) - you deserved it (1647)

On 03/02/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by JackG - United States (Montana)

Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML

#8605732 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (10210) - you deserved it (2603)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:05am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Montana)



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