Today, I was at my brother's bachelor party in a strip club. One of the strippers came up to me and said "you were my biology teacher." I walked out after that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (129) - you totally deserved it (27)
On 03/21/2010 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Justin thao - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my wife got drunk and thought I was going to leave her so she super glued my wedding ring onto my finger while I was sleeping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8975) - you totally deserved it (644)
On 03/20/2010 at 1:08am - love - by stuckonfinger (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12801) - you totally deserved it (1474)
On 03/16/2010 at 10:40am - misc - by please_no (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8183) - you totally deserved it (4194)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I loaded up all of my belongings into my Dad's truck to head back to my home state. After two hours of playing Tetris with my furniture, I threw a tarp over everything and sealed it tight with straps. When I went to start the truck, I couldn't find my keys. There's a chance I just dropped them outside, but my best bet is that they're probably in some nook in the bed of the truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9305) - you totally deserved it (1955)
On 03/13/2010 at 2:26pm - misc - by AprilFlowers - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out the electric bill I have been paying was on my old house. I found this out when they shut off the power to my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4704) - you totally deserved it (8140)
On 03/11/2010 at 12:18am - money - by secret - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some random guy picking up $300. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12018) - you totally deserved it (3198)
On 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm - money - by sdauner - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to bring her to her AA meeting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3553) - you totally deserved it (15534)
On 02/23/2010 at 1:33pm - kids - by geeb - United States (Minnesota)
Today, we were drawing self-portraits in school. I'm horrible at art, so I turned to the person next to me and stated that mine looked really ugly. He replied saying, "No, it looks exactly like you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12189) - you totally deserved it (3328)
On 02/22/2010 at 4:24pm - misc - by quasimodo - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I went in to a job interview with 6 other girls my age. I tried to sit down on a chair exactly like the ones every other girl was sitting on. Then, one of the interviewers offered to get me a more "sturdy" chair. For the entire interview, I got to sit in the "fat girl chair". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12687) - you totally deserved it (4422)
On 02/11/2010 at 3:15pm - misc - by HellaBomber91 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I got rear-ended. In possibly the scariest part of downtown. At night. By a man who spoke hardly any English but managed to ask if I would go out dancing with him instead of calling my insurance company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16424) - you totally deserved it (1024)
On 02/04/2010 at 1:34am - misc - by city_girl (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, the toilet at my apartment still hasn't been fixed. I have to straddle the bathtub for number 1's and go to Walmart for 2's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21000) - you totally deserved it (1354)
On 01/25/2010 at 10:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, somebody stopped by the front desk at the hotel I work at to report a vehicle had its headlights on. I wrote down the info, including the plate. Hours later, after my shift was over, I finally realized that it was MY vehicle. The battery was dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2748) - you totally deserved it (20033)
On 01/22/2010 at 1:37am - work - by HotelClerk (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
