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FMLs submitted from Michigan

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

#5515193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46795) - you deserved it (4586)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I turned down an invite to a huge private party that is rarely given to freshmen in college, because I felt bad that I hadn't had a chance to talk to my girlfriend in a couple of days. I called her a couple of hours later. She answered with, "Hey, I'm at a party. I will call you tomorrow?" FML

#5498846
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31153) - you deserved it (18798)

On 09/27/2009 at 1:23am - love - by Dead_Eye (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I called my husband during my lunch to tell him that I wanted to go out tonight for my birthday. We got in argument because he said we couldn't afford it. When I got home from work, he was gone, so I called his cell to see where he went. Answer: to the bar with his friends. FML

#5476343
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40007) - you deserved it (3001)

On 09/25/2009 at 11:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, an injured guest stopped at the front desk of the hotel and raved about my kindness and 'commitment to customer service'. He told my boss about how I'd gone to the ice machine and personally delivered a bag of ice for his injured knee. Guess who got written up for leaving the front desk? FML

Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML

#5329801
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36048) - you deserved it (1951)

On 09/18/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by cl512 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was trying out for a play I really wanted to be in. After my audition, I was feeling really good. She said she would post the cast list tomorrow. Not knowing where she would post it, I asked her. Her reply? "It doesn't matter. You won't be on it anyway." FML

#5303014
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33557) - you deserved it (2877)

On 09/16/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by Kat (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML

#5276635
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48884) - you deserved it (4112)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:44pm - love - by Soontobeex (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after finishing a three-page essay for my spanish class, I went to rip up my brainstorming paper in an act of triumph. After I finished ripping it up, I looked on my desk to see my brainstorming paper fully intact, and my essay torn into bits. FML

#5238031
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9945) - you deserved it (60801)

On 09/13/2009 at 9:00pm - work - by thissucks (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML

#5086359
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10917) - you deserved it (41753)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking through my house when I saw a strange man sitting on my couch. I asked him who he was and he said he was a friend of my mom's. He told me to join him and when I sat down, he punched me in the face and stole my cell phone, wallet, and car keys. FML

#5021178
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56070) - you deserved it (21684)

On 09/03/2009 at 3:09pm - misc - by robbed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47691) - you deserved it (15938)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

#4945684
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45465) - you deserved it (13764)

On 08/31/2009 at 1:18am - work - by Timmah (man) - United States (Michigan)



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