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FMLs submitted from Michigan

Today, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't stop looking at my phone while working. I work in the back room, and there is no clock in there. I look at my phone to check the time. That way I know how long I have left in that hellhole. FML

#21368483
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28945) - you deserved it (6787)

On 03/05/2015 at 4:19am - work - by lion2294 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my entire junior class took the ACT. On the last test, a classmate's phone went off, automatically invalidating the whole test. We all have to retake it. FML

Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML

#21364892
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28656) - you deserved it (3239)

On 02/27/2015 at 10:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30026) - you deserved it (3182)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a friend's birthday party when I got a call from my mom telling me to come home because my dog died. When I told my friend that I had to leave because of the loss, she replied with, "Okay, but you brought my gift inside, right?" FML

#21363530
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31129) - you deserved it (2618)

On 02/25/2015 at 8:43pm - animals - by natashamilan - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

#21363391
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33181) - you deserved it (4002)

On 02/25/2015 at 4:39pm - intimacy - by Fuck - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boss refused to give me vacation time for my wedding and honeymoon because she didn't have a honeymoon and because of that apparently neither should I. FML

Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML

#21348376
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47584) - you deserved it (4036)

On 02/02/2015 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by itsemilyc - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML

#21346656
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24346) - you deserved it (2165)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:00am - love - by wtf - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that the guy I've been sleeping with is my mom's gynecologist. FML

#21346230
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34236) - you deserved it (4350)

On 01/29/2015 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, while breast feeding my 7 month old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML

#21342394
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26879) - you deserved it (4318)

On 01/22/2015 at 5:36pm - kids - by ameliaruth09 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I made a joke that my boyfriend was going to end up sending me into premature labor. Later, I went into labor for real. My boyfriend thought I was faking and refused to take me to the hospital. FML

#21342125
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32293) - you deserved it (7975)

On 01/22/2015 at 6:32am - health - by unsuspectingmom - United States (Michigan)

Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML

#21341483
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36595) - you deserved it (2376)

On 01/21/2015 at 6:57am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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